


Overcoming Fear

by Copper_Nugget



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Abused Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Angst, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Has Panic Attacks, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Needs a Hug, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders-centric, Anxious Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Background Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders Are Siblings, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders In Love, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders is a Good Friend, Empath Morality | Patton Sanders, Gay Logic | Logan Sanders, Logan can see past and future, Logic | Logan Sanders Is A Good Friend, M/M, Morality | Patton Sanders Tries, Morality | Patton Sanders is a Good Friend, Multi, Protective Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Roman created illusions, Superpowers, Virgil invisibility
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:28:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 36,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23685439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Copper_Nugget/pseuds/Copper_Nugget
Summary: Virgil, Patton, Logan and Roman all have powers, and work together to understand them. They must keep these powers a secret, but with Virgil's inability to control his powers, that turns out to be more difficult than expected.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, LAMP Sanders Sides, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 66
Kudos: 235





	1. A regular day in the life of Virgil

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! I am here with a new fic!  
> Trigger warnings for this chapter:  
> anxiety, mentions of abuse

Virgil slowly made his way to school on a dark, wet, cold Monday morning. It was one of those days where it rained in late October, so it was warm enough to be rainy but still very cold. It had rained all night, forcing Virgil to go farther than he normally would have to find a park with a sheltered bench for him to sleep on. He still managed to get wet though.

Virgil was barely awake as he dragged his feet along the sidewalk. He had about an hour long walk to school and it was already near 7, so he was definitely going to be late, but he wasn’t awake enough to care. Logan would help get him caught up.

About halfway to school, the sky was beginning to lighten but the rain started again. Virgil didn’t have an umbrella, so he just pulled up his hood and turned up his music, accepting that it was just going to be one of those days.

Virgil had run away from home about a month ago. He knew other people had it worse and he was probably overreacting, but he just couldn’t take it anymore. See, Virgil had the power to turn invisible, which he would love if he could control it like his friends were able to control their powers. But he couldn’t. Every time he got overly anxious or had an anxiety attack he would go invisible, with no ability to make himself visible again until he managed to calm himself down. He hated it, but not as much as his parents had.

If he had been able to control his power he would have been fine. But no, crazy him just had to go invisible whenever his emotions felt like it. His parents didn’t like his powers, and they punished him whenever he used them, purposeful or not. Whether they starved him in the basement for a weekend or just flat out beat him, something always happened.So he ran away, and now here he was, arriving at school 45 minutes late on a Monday, soaking wet.

Was it worth it? Virgil wanted to say yes, but honestly he knew he was probably overreacting. Despite that, fight or flight kept him from returning home, so he was stuck.

When Virgil walked into class, Patton immediately looked up. He could probably sense how miserable Virgil was, as Patton was an empath. Patton looked at him sweetly, and Virgil knew he wanted to say some reassuring words, but Virgil was already interrupting by walking into class late, so he quickly shuffled to the back of the room where his desk was as all eyes fell onto him and his anxiety spiked.

As Virgil listened to the teacher drown on about semicolons and colons, he allowed himself to be absorbed by his anxiety. It wasn’t intolerable this morning, so might as well feel it now before it built up and caused an attack and invisibility later. He pulled out a pen and doodled on the desk and just felt.

It wasn’t until Patton came over after class and grabbed his free hand that he noticed what he had been doing. He was pressing his thumb nail deep into the tip of his pointer finger, leaving a deep purple indent. Patton pulled Virgils fingers apart.

“I thought you said you had stopped doing this,” Patton said, trying to look Virgil in the eye, but Virgil avoided his gaze. Patton was in his normal light blue shirt and khakis. He had a gray sweater tied around his waist. Patton had short wavy blonde hair and the biggest sweetest brown puppy dog eyes ever seen behind a pair of thick framed black glasses. Virgil knew if he looked at them he would blurt out too much, and he couldn’t risk it.

“Sorry, I didn’t notice,” Virgil muttered, pulling his hand back. He zipped his backpack before Patton could see the contents. He didn't want anyone to know his situation. They would pity him, or tell him to go back home or worse, try to help. Virgil couldn’t accept anyone’s help in this overreaction. If he was going to be stupid, he was going to do it on his own.

When they got outside the classroom, Roman and Logan were waiting. They were about the same height and both of fairly average build, but that is where the similarities ended. Roman wore a bright red shirt with a white leather jacket and jeans. His eyes were bright green and his hair was a medium brown.

Logan wore dark jeans with a black button down and blue tie. His hair was midnight black and his eyes were almost as dark. He wore black glasses.

“What happened to you?” Roman asked Virgil the moment they exited the classroom. “Did you walk a mile in this rainstorm or what?” Virgil just shrugged in response.

“Clearly he walked in the rain for a significant amount of time Roman, how else would he have gotten that wet, and why else would he have been so late.” Logan replied.

“Uhg, seriously Logan, I told you not to do that with me,” Virgil muttered, uncomfortable and worried that Logan would see too much. See, Logan could see the past and the future. He used to get random visions, but he had learned to control it and could control who the vision is of and when he has it, although he can’t control what timeframe he sees.

“I wasn’t looking into you, I was looking into Patton,” Logan replied matter of factly, “You just happen to share the same first period.”

“Aww, you wanted to see how I did on that essay you helped me with, how sweet kiddo,” Patton said, giving the taller boy a hug.

“Yeah, well, if I am going to put in the effort to assist I like to see if my work was successful. And it was, as you got an A, well done.”

Virgil rolled his eyes and walked away as the three continued chatting. He would see them after school, but for now he had a class to get to.

Virgil met up with Logan, Roman and Patton after school to go to Roman’s house for a “power playdate” as Patton liked to call them. Basically it was when they all met up to work with their powers and try to learn more about them. They did it every Monday at Roman’s place because his parents are never home and he has a ton of space because his family was rich.

When they got there they went to the roof of Roman’s mansion. Roman’s brother Remus never joined, he just spent the time in his room playing video games. Roman got to practice tonight.

Roman’s power is to create illusions. He could make someone believe they were on the beach or in the jungle if they were locked in a prison cell, it was so real. He has been working on smaller things recently, for example, creating the illusion that someone is wet.

“Think about the feeling of being wet,” Logan instructed as Roman looked intently at Patton, “And focus that feeling onto Patton. Not the rain or the setting, just the feeling of being wet.”

“Okay…” Roman muttered, deep in concentration. “I think I got it,” He said after a moment. “Patton, do you feel wet?”

“Sorry kiddo,” Patton replied, “I’ve got nothing.”

They kept trying until it started getting dark and Roman clearly needed a break. They decided to head downstairs and get some snacks.

“What do you want, Virgil?” Patton asked as he shuffled through Roman’s cabinets.

“I don't know,” Virgil replied, “Whatever you guys want is fine.” In truth, Virgil was starving and really wanted more than just a snack. He hadn’t eaten since Saturday, but he didn’t want to say anything and raise any concern.

“I would enjoy some chips and salsa,” Logan chipped in.

“Sounds good to me!” Roman replied.

“Chips and salsa it is!” Patton said as he pulled out a bag of chips and went to the fridge to find the salsa. Once they had all eaten more chips and salsa than could possibly be healthy, they decided to settle down in the living room and mess with the rest of their powers some. They all sat cross legged on the floor, except for Virgil who was draped across the couch, playing on his phone while he listened to the others.

“Logan, I want to know what is going to happen on my birthday in three months,” Patton said. Logan rolled his eyes, but then focused his attention on Patton.

“Hmmm,” Logan muttered. “I do not see your birthday, however I do see tomorrow morning.” Logan adjusted his glasses as he sat up and looked at Virgil, “You will not be present in first period tomorrow.”

“How come you always see stuff involving me when you are looking into Patton’s future,” Virgil moaned, “And I will be in first period tomorrow, hopefully.” Roman snickered from his spot. “Got something to say Princey?” Virgil asked, sitting up.

“Nope,” Roman said, trying to suppress his grin, “Except to point out that you haven’t made it to first period on time in a month,” Roman said with a laugh, “not that surprising that you won’t be there tomorrow.” Virgil rolled his eyes and sighed, laying back on the couch,

“You try getting to first period on time when you have to walk from all over town,” Virgil muttered, then froze. Shit, did he say that out loud. He looked at the others. Damn it, he did. “Ha, ha,” Virgil continued shakily, “That was a joke guys, come one, don’t take everything so seriously,” Virgil finished with a nervous chuckle. None of them bought it, especially not Patton, but no one said anything.

“Well, I guess it is your turn Virgil, considering we have not worked with your powers in a few months,” Logan said, changing the subject, not that this was any better.

“Nah,” Virgil said, starting to sit up again and grabbing his bag, “I should actually probably get home, you know my parents don’t like me staying out too late.”

It was true, his parent’s didn’t like him staying out late, and he really probably should go home. However, he definitely was not going home, and his parents definitely didn’t care how late he stayed out when he didn’t live there.

“Virgil, we will have to work on your powers at some point or else your lack of control could become dangerous.” Logan said as Virgil got up.

“Yeah, yeah, don’t want me accidentally turning invisible in public and getting tested like a guinea pig, yada yada, don’t worry, I’ve heard it all before, but it’s fine, I’ve got it under control,” Virgil tossed his backpack onto his shoulder and headed out the door. “See you losers tomorrow,” he said, before walking out the door and walking in a random direction, wondering where he would spend the night tonight.

  
  



	2. Virgil is an idiot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I'm back!  
> Trigger warnings:  
> anxiety attack, abuse, self deprecating thoughts, misuse of medication  
> let me know if I missed anything!

Virgil did not have it under control.

The next morning Virgil woke up on a park bench much closer to the school this time, but he could tell something was off. His anxiety was going crazy, telling him to check the time and to run from  _ something  _ and damn it this is gonna be a bad day.

He tried to calm himself down as he pulled out his phone, but it was dead, meaning his alarm probably didn’t go off, shoot. That was when he noticed that it was light out. It must be at least after 8, and he had about a 20 minute walk to school. Logan was right, Virgil was going to miss the first period.

As Virgil walked to school he tried to remind himself to breathe. He had to keep control all of these emotions or his powers would activate, and he couldn’t let that happen, at least not until after school when he could find a good place to hide.

Virgil put on his headphones, wishing his phone wasn’t dead so he could listen to some music to calm him down, and blocked out the world as he walked. He barely noticed he was at his class until he felt himself opening the door and felt the weight of many pairs of eyes falling on him. Logan raised an eyebrow at him and Roman rolled his eyes as Virgil ducked his head and went to his seat.

That is when Virgil noticed the teacher trying to get his attention. He pulled down his headphones (which still weren’t playing music, they were just a comforting presence that helped block out noise) and tried to breath as all of the class turned to look at him.

“Virgil, I am going to need you to put those headphones away, and I will be writing you up for tardiness,” Virgil’s science teacher said without a hint of sympathy. Virgil hated this teacher.

Virgil slowly pulled off his headphones and put them in his backpack before sinking into his chair, trying to block out the world as he dug his nails into his fingertips and tried to keep his breathing normal. Logan looked back at him, clearly concerned, but Virgil just gave him a thumbs up then went back to staring at his desk.

The teacher continued to talk as Virgil’s breathing got faster. His mind was going in circles. What if his friends figured out why he was late? What if he couldn’t protect them from himself. What if he had an anxiety attack right now and got them all discovered? What if What if What if…

Virgil was panicking. An attack was coming and he would turn invisible right here in the middle of class and there was nothing he could do. He would be busted and tested just like Logan always said. He was screwed.

He felt his powers brimming to the surface right as he noticed Logan whisper something to Roman in the front of the room. He only had a moment to realize Logan probably knew what was coming when he felt himself go weightless, and he was gone, invisible. That same moment, he heard the classroom door slam, and glanced at Roman.

Virgil didn’t know what was going on as Roman and Logan talked to the teacher, he just tried to breathe, knowing it was no use. 

Vaguely, Virgil noticed Logan grabbing his backpack and carefully pulling him from the room with the same hand.

He needed to breathe.

He felt himself pulled out of the classroom and brought to the bathroom.

Breathe

He found himself on the floor with Logan in front of him. He said something about Roman getting Patton. He barely noticed.

Breathe

He heard shuffling and suddenly the headphones he was forced to put away were on his ears, playing his calming music that he listened to on bad days. He vaguely wondered how Logan knew where his head was when he was invisible. Logan had just guessed based on where the gasping sound was coming from.

He was starting to breathe

He saw Logan taking deep, timed breaths, demonstrating for Virgil to copy. Virgil did. Logan heard Virgil’s gasps slow.

Virgil was breathing.

Patton and Roman were back. Logan kept breathing. Virgil kept breathing, until nearly 5 minutes later the weightless feeling went away and Virgil was visible again, sitting on the floor of the bathroom with his only three friends in front of him, looking concerned. They cared.

Virgil was visible again, so his friends could see the tears on his face and the panic in his eyes. They could see his nails digging into his fingertips and the way his whole body was shaking. He was a mess.

“Hey kiddo,” Patton said as he gently removed his headphones from one ear.

“I’m sorry,” Virgil muttered, tears running down his face, “imsorryimsorryimsorry.”

“It’s okay kiddo. It wasn’t your fault,” Patton said.

“But it was! We could have all gotten discovered because I’m such an unstable mess and can’t control my powers. It is all my fault!” Virgil said, beginning to yell.

Patton sighed and grabbed Virgil’s hands, forcing his fingers to separate. “Virgil, we wanted to wait for you to come to us, but things seem a lot more serious than we originally expected. We knew you tried to avoid being home, but then we saw the stuff in your bag and… Virgil, where have you been staying?”

Virgil’s eyes widened in fear and shock. They weren’t supposed to know. They couldn’t know. They wouldn’t understand, he hurt everyone around him. They can’t help, he was on his own. “I’m fine,” Virgil said, not answering the question as he pushed himself off the bathroom floor. “Just a bad anxiety day, but I’ve got it under control now, it won’t happen again.”

“Virgil are you homeless?” Logan asked.

Virgil rolled his eyes and sighed, “not that it is any of your business, but yeah.” Virgil headed toward the bathroom door, but turned when Patton said in the smallest voice, sounding so hurt,

“Why didn’t you tell us?”

“Because I don’t need your help. I’m overreacting and I’m bad for everyone around me and I don’t want you all involved in my mess.” Virgil snapped, turning toward Patton. 

“I highly doubt that is true. If you are worried about this being an overreaction, that suggests that that is not the case,” Logan cut in. Virgil just rolled his eyes again, turning away from the other three.

“Whatever, you guys aren’t gonna get it and you don’t need to. See you guys tomorrow,” Virgil said as he headed for the door. He felt a hand grab his wrist and heard Roman,

“Wait, let’s just talk-” Roman started. Virgil turned, his eyes full of anger and fear and sadness.

“Leave! Me! Alone!” Virgil growled, yanking his wrist from the taller boy’s grip and turning to run before anyone could stop him.

Virgil didn’t realize where he was going until he was there. He found himself standing in front of his house, looking at the falling apart building he used to live in.

It was a small one story house with a basement. Everything about it screamed unsafe. The door was chipped as Virgil opened it with a creak. The house was barely lit. There were holes in the furniture and it stank of mold. 

Virgil didn’t want to be there, but there was something he had to get. When his parents realized how his anxiety was affecting his powers, they found some black market medication for him. He didn’t take it, because it made him feel numb, and that almost scared him more than the anxiety, that numbness, that lack of emotion. But today had shown him that he was a risk to others when he felt like this, so he would have to get over it.

Virgil made his way to the dirty bathroom, thinking no one would be home, and grabbed the bottle, throwing it into his bag then turning to leave as quickly as possible.

“Virgil, you are home,” A voice said, causing Virgil to jump in fear. It was his mom.

“I’m not staying,” Vigil muttered, throwing his backpack over his shoulder and heading for the front door.

“What did you take boy,” His dad’s voice joined in. He saw his dad come from around the corner, starting Virgil down.

“M-my m-medicine,” Virgil stammered, trying to speak through the fear that had settled in his stomach.

“Oh, that’s my boy, you finally understand our ways,” his mom cried gleefully

“I’m not doing this for you,” Virgil muttered under his breath.

“What was that boy,” His dad said, moving toward him angrily.

“Forget it,” Virgil snapped, looking up, “you’re a fucking asshole.”

“Don’t speak to your father like that,” Virgil’s mom yelled, standing up to slap him across the face. Virgil felt the sting of the blow across his face, letting out a yelp as he curled in on himself, trying to protect his body from the next blow. He knew better than to talk to them like that, what was wrong with him!?

The blows kept coming as Virgil cowered on the floor. He felt himself dragged to the basement. His parents locked him in and left him there. Bleeding and hungry and broken.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I'm so excited for the next couple chapters! I hope you enjoyed!!


	3. Virgil finds himself feeling okay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I'm back again! I think it's time to get Virgil out of his situation here, don't you?  
> Trigger warnings:  
> talk of abuse, anxiety, misuse of medication, injuries  
> Let me know if I missed anything!

Virgil’s parents didn’t come back for 3 days. When they finally did, Virgil was cowered in a corner. He watched their approach suspiciously.

“You’re not gonna speak to me,” Virgil’s dad growled, “You are going to leave this house now, and you are not going to come back.”

Virgil didn’t do anything as he watched them leave. They did not lock the door. They left it unlocked for him to leave.

This was odd, as Virgil had assumed they would make him stay with them again, but he decided not to question it too much. Virgil groaned and pushed himself off the floor. He allowed his fear to drive him, pushing him through the pain and out of the house. He made it to the park a couple blocks away before collapsing, tears staining his bloody face. 

It took 2 more days of stop and go and pain and hunger before Virgil made it to the nearest friends house, Roman’s. The combination of starvation and injuries had him moving very slow. When he got there, he didn’t even have the energy left to knock. He collapsed on the ground, shaking, and set his head on the door with a thud. He let his eyes drift closed.

5 minutes later, Virgil woke from his doze to Remus’s voice, “It’s midnight, where the hell were you?” Remus yelled as Virgil fell through the doorway.

Virgil pulled himself up and just shrugged painfully, before limping in and collapsing on the couch. In the living room where they had sat on Monday. He looked at the floor in front of him where his friends had sat that day. He wished he could go back.

“Roman,” Remus yelled, “your missing friend is here, he doesn’t look too good.”

Virgil heard footsteps running down the stairs, then suddenly there were two people in his line of vision.

“Oh my gods Virgil,” Roman exclaimed as he ran over to the boy on the couch. “Nobody’s seen you in days,” He said trying to choke back the tears of relief that threatened to overwhelm him.

“I know,” Virgil muttered, trying to sit up and act as if nothing was wrong. Roman did a double take.

“Is that blood?” Roman asked, gesturing to the stains on Virgil’s clothes and the dried blood on his face and arms.

“…..no?”

“Remus, help get Virgil cleaned up, I’m gonna call Paton and Logan,” Roman replied, smart enough to know that it was in fact blood.

As Remus began cleaning Virgil up, Virgil laid back on the couch, trying to ignore the pain. When Remus began cleaning Virgil’s face, he noticed the sunken features and the huge shadows under Virgil’s eyes.

“When did you last sleep?” Remus asked.

“I’m scared of the dark,” Virgil replied. He had not slept in the basement at all, it was so, so dark down there. He got a couple hours in the last 2 days, but not much, because he was scared of the dark.

“When did you last eat?” Remus asked.

“Few days ago,” Virgil muttered. He didn’t have the energy to lie. He didn’t have the energy to do anything. As Remus cleaned him up, being oddly gentle, Virgil relaxed into the couch and fell asleep, letting the pain fade into darkness.

Virgil was woken up at about 8 the next morning by Logan shaking him. It was Sunday, and Virgil was still so tired he just wanted to go back to sleep. He tried to shove Logan away, but Logan persisted.

“What do you want?” Virgil groaned.

“I want to know when you last ate,” Logan replied simply.

“Monday,” Virgil groaned, “Now can I go back to sleep?”

“How much did you sleep while you were gone?” 

“I maybe got 4 or 5 hours,” Virgil replied, “Which is why you should let me sleep more.”

Logan gave in, and let Virgil go back to sleep while he went to update the others.

“Virgil only got about 4 or 5 hours of sleep in the 5 days he was gone, so I am going to let him sleep a little longer, however he has not eaten in 6 days so we will have to get him up soon to address that.”

“How could this happen?” Roman muttered mostly to himself,

“He said he was scared of the dark,” Remus chipped in, “wherever he was was probably dark.”

“Did he go home?” Patton wondered out loud, “We know they sometimes locked him into that dark basement. Logan saw it.”

“Yes, that is in fact where he was.” Logan stated. They all looked at him, confused. “Okay, don’t tell Virgil this. He needs to trust us all, and he needs to believe I don’t look into his past or future to do that.” The others nodded and Logan continued, “At school, after Virgil had been gone for 3 days, I was focusing on him, trying to figure out where he was, and I saw that the day he left he went to his parents, and they beat him and locked him in the basement. Like previously stated, I did not want him to know I had seen it, so I did the most logical thing I could think of and confronted his parents. I told them I knew where he was and threatened to call the police. I looked into the future afterwards to make sure it worked, and I saw that Virgil would show up here. I didn’t tell any of you before because I didn’t want you to worry even more, and I knew someone,” Logan looked at Roman, “may act recklessly.”

They all went quiet after that. They knew Virgil had a bad home life, Logan had seen a lot of it before Virgil had demanded he stop. They had asked Logan to look into it about a month ago when Virgil had begun acting more distant than normal, but Logan had refused, saying Virgil’s trust was more important. The day of Virgil’s anxiety attack however, they had seen the things in Virgil’s backpack and realized he was homeless, but they weren’t sure about how long Virgil had been in that situation until now.

No one knew what else to say, so Patton got to cooking some eggs and sausage (Logan said pancakes did not have the amount of nutrition Virgil needed right now). Roman made sure all of Virgil’s bandages were good, and Logan set the table. About an hour later, they all agreed they needed to wake Virgil up to eat.

Virgil was quiet all through the meal. Patton kept encouraging him to eat more, but Virgil didn’t actually feel that hungry, and Logan said to eat as much as was comfortable. After finishing, Virgil grabbed his bag, thanked them for their help, then went to leave, but none of them were about to let that happen.

“Virgil, I believe we need to talk,” Logan said. Virgil sighed. He knew what was coming. He went and sat down on the couch after grabbing a glass of water. His friends settled in their normal places on the floor between Virgil and the TV. Logan sat facing Virgil and away from the TV, while Roman leaned against the couch and Patton settled in next to Logan. As Logan began to speak, he took one of his pills that he had gotten from his house, he knew this conversation would be anxiety provoking.

“Virgil, we know you have been homeless for the last month, although we did not know until recently. We also have an idea as to where you have been, but we would like to give you a chance to explain.”

“I ran away because my parents suck, though it was probably an overreaction. I went back to get the medicine that makes it so I don’t accidentally use my powers. They locked me in the basement for a few days and beat me. The last two days were me trying to get here.”

As Virgil finished he felt the medicine take effect. Suddenly he felt numb, and after the last few days of fear it was a huge relief. Virgil sighed and leaned back as the others stared at him. Patton’s eyes widened,

“Virgil, why aren’t you feeling anything? You were feeling just a moment ago and now…” Patton said, looking at Virgil in concern and confusion. Logan looked between Patton and Virgil for a moment, thinking.

“Virgil, does this medicine make you stop feeling?” Logan asked. Virgil shrugged,

“It’s an anti-anxiety medicine my parents got on the black market. When my anxiety isn’t there, it can’t accidentally trigger my powers.”

“That is very unsafe, Virgil,” Logan said, looking at him over his glasses, “Clearly this medication is stronger than it should be. You must stop taking it.”

“You think I like feeling numb!?” Virgil yelled, “I don’t! But I also don’t like risking all of our lives cause I can’t keep myself under control! This isn’t your choice! I don't need your help, any of you, I have this under control! You know what happened now, so I’m gonna leave before I hurt you guys more!” He hated feeling this way, useless and weak. But he hated what he felt now even more. He knew he should be feeling useless and weak, those were his thoughts, but he felt none of it. Virgil stormed toward the door, and Roman grabbed his wrist, just like in the bathroom, except this time, Virgil didn’t pull away, he turned around. “I don't want to hurt you guys.” He whispered.

“You won’t,” Roman said simply. After a few moments of silence, Virgil allowed Roman to lead him back to the couch. Once he had sat down, Logan began.

“I believe the best way to proceed in this situation is for Virgil to stay here for now. We can do some training to get better control over Virgil’s powers, and we will only resort to that medication as a last resort, and only after I do some research to make sure it is safe.” Logan held out his hand expectantly for the bottle, and Virgil reluctantly handed it over.

“I just don’t think I can use my powers guys. I know you all think they are these cool things, but I was raised to think this power was a curse. All I have ever gotten from using it is punishment. I want to learn how to control it, but only to keep myself from using it.” Virgil said, looking down at the couch studiously.

“I am not sure that is a wise decision Virgil, but if it is what you want then we can try it.” Logan said as he put the bottle into his bag.

“It is what I want,” Virgil said. 

“Then that is what we’ll do kiddo!” Patton said. “But for now, I say we get in our onesies and watch a movie!” Everyone agreed, even Remus, so they all got in their onesies and binged Disney movies for the rest of the day. Patton and Logan were on the floor leaning against the couch, while Roman and Remus had gotten onto the couch and were chatting all through the movies. Eventually, Virgil found his head on Roman’s shoulder, and Roman’s hand hesitantly began to stroke Virgil’s hair. 

As the medication wore off, Virgil expected to feel anxious after everything that had just been shared and how much things were changing. He expected to feel the urge to pull away from Roman and leave and pretend the conversation from that morning had never happened. But instead he felt a weight lifted off his shoulders, he felt… okay. And for now, that was enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading! I am so excited to keep this story going. We have got some fluffier stuff coming soon (relationships have to get going eventually, right?), which isn't my strong suit but hopefully you all like it. But don't worry, the angst will be back ;)


	4. Virgil and Roman are cute

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's some fluff guys, I hope you like it!!  
> Trigger warnings:  
> general anxiety, talk of triggers(Virgil's powers being a trigger)  
> other that that I don't think there is much, but let me know if I missed anything

That evening Roman helped get Virgil settled into one of the guest rooms. The others had stayed as long as they could, but by 7 Virgil was already exhausted, so they left to let him get some sleep. As Virgil settled into the bed, Roman turned off the lights.

“....Roman?” Virgil said, although it sounded more like a question.

“Yeah Virge?” Roman asked, turning around from the doorway.

“I don’t like the dark,” Virgil said.

“Okay,” Roman replied, feeling like an idiot for having forgotten that, “would you like me to get a lamp or just leave the light on?”

“Leave the light on please,” Virgil muttered. Roman nodded. He turned back on the light and turned to leave the room, but stopped when he heard Virgil start to say something.

“What was that?” Roman asked, turning around once more.

“Nothing,” Virgil replied, sounding small and scared from where he lay on the bed, “It’s stupid.”

“Let me be the judge of that,” Roman said, leaning against the doorway.

“I just…” Virgil started. Roman motioned for him to go on, “I was just wondering if… I dunno… if maybe you’d stay in here tonight…” Virgil finished, looking embarrassed. Roman was quiet. “See, told you it was stupid.”

“No, no, it isn’t stupid, and I am more than willing to stay. I was just thinking that if you want someone with you maybe we could just set you up in my room for the time being. I could get a lamp for you, and we can pull in a mattress and you can stay in there however long you need. Just don’t touch my stuff.” Virgil smirked at that last part. “How does that sound?” Virgil just nodded and grabbed his stuff from beside the bed. They walked across a long hall and past many doors before coming to Roman’s room.

The room was covered in Disney posters, to the point where Virgil wasn’t sure what color the walls were underneath. The bed was against the right wall and the desk was against the left wall. Beside the door was a TV with a large bin of Disney movies underneath. Beside the bed was a large dresser, the only thing not cluttered in the room (Roman took good care of his clothes). The desk was cluttered and the bed was not made. Virgil tried to suppress a smirk as he took in just how messy Roman’s room was.

“We can put the mattress here…” Roman said as he kicked some papers out of the way to clear a space right next to his bed. “Remus!” Roman yelled.

“What do you want!” Remus yelled back from downstairs.

“I need your help getting a mattress into my room”

“Why?”

Roman rolled his eyes, “For Virgil obviously.”

“I thought he was staying in a guest room,” Remus yelled, annoyed.

“Well plans changed so get up here,” Roman yelled. They heard a very loud sigh before hearing footsteps moving toward the stairs. Roman smiled triumphantly.

“I could have helped,” Virgil muttered, embarrassed to be causing so much trouble, but slightly amused.

“In that state, yeah right?” Roman replied with a chuckle, “you may be doing better than when you got here, but you are still half starved and sleep deprived, so go sit on my bed and let me help you.”

“Yeah but…”

“No buts!” Roman cut him off, “Just suck it up and sit down!”

Virgil rolled his eyes but did as he was told as he watched the two brothers struggle to get a mattress into Roman’s room. Once they had managed that, Roman sent Remus to get a lamp while he got to work making the bed. 

After the corners of the fitted sheet popped off at least 5 times, Roman finally accepted Virgil’s help. It took a few more tries, but they finally got the sheet on. Making the bed the rest of the way was easy and Virgil was curled up and already half asleep in no time.

“Hey Virge?” Roman asked suddenly.

“Hmm?” Virgil replied.

“You know we all love you, right?” Roman asked. Virgil shrugged, “no matter how annoying or secluded you get, Patton, Logan, Remus, me, we all love you. I know it isn’t as easy as just saying it, but I just wanted to make sure you knew.” Virgil was quiet for a while after that, and Roman had assumed he had just fallen asleep when Virgil said,

“I like you guys a lot too.”

It may not have been the exact words, but Roman knew Virgil was saying ‘I love you guys too’. Virgil started talking again, “I’m sorry I can’t say the big L word, but I really care about you guys. I wouldn’t try so hard to protect you all from me if I didn’t care.”

Roman nodded, “Well, let us protect you for a change,” Roman said. “You don’t have to protect us from yourself. Just let us help you.”

“Okay,” Virgil murmured, “I mean, I basically agreed to that earlier, by staying here and saying I’d work on my powers, but okay.” Roman nodded, satisfied that Virgil understood. He didn’t always have to be the protector. “G’night Roman,” Virgil sighed, falling asleep a moment later.

“Good night Virgil,” Roman said quietly as he watched the boy’s breathing. That is how Roman fell asleep, watching Virgil breathe, looking more peaceful than Roman had ever seen him.

Virgil woke abruptly to Roman’s alarm at 6:30 the next morning. For a moment he forgot where he was, before remembering he was in Roman’s room. He let out a long groan. He heard Roman shift in the bed beside him, turning off the alarm.

“How ya feelin?” Roman asked sleepily.

“Tired,” Virgil groaned, “need coffee.” Roman laughed, leaving Virgil to wake up while he got dressed. Virgil sleepily made his way to the kitchen, knowing Roman would be a while, and starting digging around for stuff to make coffee.

“Watcha lookin for?” Remus asked from behind him, causing Virgil to jump.

“Coffee,” Virgil said after recovering from the scare. Remus rolled his eyes and went to pull out some coffee to make for Virgil.

“Y’know, you’re kinda adorable in the mornings, in a slightly frightening way,” Remus commented as he made Virgil’s coffee. Virgil hissed. “See, exactly what I mean. It’s adorable, yet I am also fearing for my life.” Remus chuckled, bringing Virgil his finished coffee.

They were both quiet while Virgil drank the coffee, trying to get his brain to wake up. After a few moments, Remus broke the silence. “I’m gonna grab some cereal, you want anything?” Virgil shook his head. “Okay,” Remus shrugged and began making up his breakfast. 

“Y’know,” Remus started, “My brother really cares about you. When he came downstairs when and saw you the other night, well, I haven’t seen him that freaked out since mom and dad left on a work trip without telling us for the first time.” Remus chuckled cynically at the memory,

“M’sorry,” Virgil muttered, looking into his black coffee.

“It’s okay,” Remus said, “except it isn’t, because if you ever hurt my brother,” Remus turned and looked at Virgil, “I will kill you.”

Virgil shrugged, “If I hurt Roman then I’ll probably deserve it.” Virgil took another sip of coffee.

“Wow, it really is no fun to threaten people when they think they deserve it,” Remus sighed, “Whatever, my point has been made.”

“Yep,” Virgil said, downing the rest of his coffee, “Loud and clear.” He got up and washed his mug in the sink before putting it away. Just as he was closing the cabinet, Roman came down. 

“Hurry up and get dressed Virgil, we have to leave in 10 minutes or we will miss the bus.” Virgil rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, well I would be dressed if  _ someone _ hadn’t been hogging the bathroom for the past 20 minutes,” Virgil said.

“Look, I’m sorry I have  _ standards _ unlike  _ some _ people,” Roman replied as Virgil walked past.

“Whatever Princey,” Virgil said, heading upstairs. Virgil got dressed pretty quick, used to having to make his routine quick in the public bathrooms he had been getting dressed in. He was back downstairs in 5 minutes, where he found and irritated looking Roman throwing together some kind of snack bag. “What’s that for?” Virgil asked.

“Well a little birdy told me you didn’t eat breakfast, and you don’t normally eat school lunch either, so I’m taking some stuff to make sure you eat enough to survive,” Roman said, clearly annoyed.

“Oh.. um… thanks I guess,” Virgil replied awkwardly, looking at the ground and rocking on his heels.

“You’re welcome,” Roman sighed, shoving the paper bag into Virgil’s hands, “now lets go before we miss the bus.”

The school day goes fairly normally, except for the insane amounts of homework Virgil has to catch up on. In fact, things were so normal the Virgil almost forgot that he was the subject of the power playdate that afternoon. Almost. 

Virgil had study hall 8th period. None of his friends were in there with him, and the smart thing to do would have been to work on his giant stack of homework, but with that afternoon’s power playdate in mind, Virgil instead opted to hide in the bathroom and listen to music. When the end of day bell rings, Virgil doesn't move. The others find him there about 20 minutes later.

“Hey kiddo, we couldn’t find you, we got worried,” Patton said once they found him.

“Sorry, I kinda just got freaked out about this afternoon,” Virgil said.

“That’s okay, but you’ve got nothing to worry about! It will be perfectly safe, and it will help all of use feel better with you having better control.” Patton replied happily,

“I know, it’s just… I have to use them to learn to control them, and my powers just bring so many bad memories…” Virgil shook his head, “whatever, I’m being stupid, lets just go get this over with.”

“You are not being stupid Virgil,” Logan cut in, “It sounds like your powers are a trigger for you. There are ways we can deal with that to make it more tolerable. You can listen to your music while we practice, we could have some other distraction like an audiobook, or we could use your breathing exercises. We are going to do everything we can to make this situation as comfortable as possible.” Virgil nodded.

“Okay, thanks guys, I feel a bit better now.” It was true, he did feel a bit better, but not entirely. And that is likely why, on the walk to the bus stop, Virgil found his hand in Roman’s, gripping tightly. Roman held his hand back and gave it a gentle squeeze. Virgil could almost hear Roman saying “we all love you. Let us protect you.” Virgil leaned in toward Roman, and let himself feel protected.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I know I'm not the best fluff writer, but I did have a good time writing this, so I hope you enjoyed reading it too!!!


	5. Virgil participates in a power playdate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: I'm not gonna post this consistently  
> Also me: Posts basically one chapter a day  
> No promises that I'll keep to a schedule though, I may fall behind!!  
> Anyways, here is the next chapter, I hope you enjoy!!!  
> Trigger Warnings:  
> Anxiety attack, abuse

When the bus got to their stop, Virgil almost didn’t get off. If it wasn’t for Roman’s hand still holding his, he probably wouldn’t have. Alas, he did get off the bus, and he did follow the others to the roof, where the training would begin.

“We can begin whenever you are ready Virgil,” Logan said, setting his stuff down.

“Not sure I’ll ever be ready,” Virgil muttered, keeping a death grip on Roman’s hand, “So let's just get this over with.”

“That’s the spirit?” Patton said, almost like a question. Patton could feel Virgil’s anxiety building the closer to beginning they got. He glanced at Logan, and Logan nodded, understanding easily.

“How about we turn on some music?” Logan offered, pulling out his phone. Virgil nodded, and Logan began playing Twenty One Pilots. Virgil enjoyed listening to them when he was anxious because it wasn’t as upbeat as some other bands he liked, and it’s focus on the lyrics gave Virgil something to ground himself.

“Okay Virgil,” Logan began, “How about we start with you telling us how it feels when you turn invisible? That way we can better instruct you to focus on that feeling.”

“Okay,” Virgil said, “It kinda feels like I go weightless? Like gravity doesn't affect me anymore because I’m not there to be affected. Does that make any sense?”

“That was perfect kiddo!” Patton chipped in, bouncing in excitement.

“Yes, that was indeed adequate,” Logan said. “Now, I need you to focus on that feeling. Feel yourself go weightless, and let that feeling take over.”

Virgil tried, he really did, but he couldn’t do it. “I… I can’t,” Virgil muttered, ashamed.

“That’s okay kiddo, we didn’t expect you to get it the first time,” Patton replied, “You’re just scared. I can feel it coming off you in waves. You’ve gotta relax.”

Virgil nodded. He focused on the music and the feeling of being weightless. Suddenly, Virgil couldn’t hear the music anymore. He saw Patton’s eyes widen before he wasn’t there anymore, but not because he had control. The fear took over, and suddenly his mind brought him back…

_ Virgil was in his living room. It was his 10th birthday. His parents had promised to give him a party if he didn’t use his powers, and he had managed to not use his powers for over a month. But his parents didn’t follow through _

__ _ “Mommy, Daddy, I did it, I get a party!” Virgil yelled excitedly, running into the kitchen. _

__ _ “Ha,” Virgil’s dad said, “you think you deserve a party for not using your powers, you little brat, you don’t get a party. It’s you fault you have these stupid powers in the first place!” _

__ _ “But… but you said…” Virgil stuttered, feeling his anxiety threatening to overwhelm him as his dad moved closer. _

__ _ “I know what I said boy,” his dad said, only 6 inches from Virgil’s face, “I LIED!” Virgil heard his mom laugh from behind his dad, enjoying the show. Tears began running down Virgil’s face as he tried to keep the fear at bay. He felt himself begin to flicker. _

__ _ “Ha, look at him, using his powers because we aren’t gonna reward him,” His mom taunted, “why don’t we give him another incentive not to use them.” _

__ _ “Yes, why don’t we do that,” Virgil’s dad whispered. Then, he leaned back and slapped Virgil across the face. Virgil yelped and turned entirely invisible, completely losing control. “You think we can’t hurt you when we can’t see you,” His dad continued, “WRONG!” He felt a fist hit him in the side and the tears came faster. _

__ _ His dad felt around and eventually got his hands on Virgil’s shoulders. “Here he is honey, your turn.” He turned Virgil toward his mom and held him there while his mom threw kitchen supplies at him and hit him. Virgil finally fell, and his dad lost his grip. _

__ _ “You BRAT! Think you can get away from us?” Virgil whimpered, and his dad followed the noise and found him, grabbing him by the foot and dragging him to the basement. “If we ever see your powers again, this is what you will get. There’s your incentive!” His dad yelled before slamming the door and locking it behind him. _

Virgil came back to reality with a gasp. He was on the ground, and the others kept glancing in his direction, yet not quite at him. Virgil gasped again as he tried to regain control of his breathing but couldn’t. He couldn’t stay invisible for any longer. He had to get out hehadtogetout…

“Help..” Virgil choked out. “Can't...breathe…” Logan looked over and walked in his direction. 

“Say something else Virgil,” Logan said looking around, “I need to know where you are so I can help.” Virgil gasped and Logan looked down and kneeled in front of him. “Grab my hands Virgil,” Logan said, holding his hands in front of him. Virgil grabbed them. “Good job, now, I want you to breathe in as I squeeze your hands, and out as I release, okay?” Virgil didn’t reply, but Logan began.

Breathe in

Hold

Breathe out

In

Hold

Out 

Virgil flickered back to visibility and gasped. The tears in his eyes spilled over in relief. “Oh thank god thank god,” Virgil muttered looking down at himself. Logan nodded thoughtfully and released Virgil’s hands, standing up. 

“Well, clearly the music was not enough. However, Virgil always seems to find firm pressure grounding, is that correct Virgil?”

Virgil nodded, “If I know it is coming. If it is sudden, well, you all know what happens.” They all nodded, Roman the most fiercely. He had once grabbed Virgil’s backpack in the hallway to slow him down so he could catch up. Virgil had whipped around and grabbed his wrist hard, about to hit him when he realized it was Roman. They didn’t touch him without warning after that. 

“Perhaps if one of us touches you and keeps you grounded in the here and now, it could help prevent you from going back to places from your past.” Logan said. Virgil nodded hesitantly.

“But if that doesn’t work then I’m done for today,” Virgil said shakily getting to his feet. The others nodded. Virgil looked at Roman and Logan expectantly. 

“Oh, us?” Roman said, surprised. “You want both of us, I figured just Logan.”

Virgil just shrugged, and the other two came over, each one grabbing one of his hands. Virgil held them hard and took a deep breath. He focused on the feeling of being weightless, while keeping firm pressure on the others. He was here, and his parents were not here. He was safe. Patton smiled at him encouragingly, feeling Virgil’s determination.

Suddenly, he felt himself go weightless like before, except this time he was still here. He grabbed Logan and Roman’s hands even tighter. He felt the fear come, but he didn’t dwell on it. He just focused on the pressure on his hands, he focused on Patton’s smile, and he stayed there. 

Virgil let out a breathy laugh, breaking his focus as he flickered back into visibility. He lowered himself to the ground, exhausted, as he stared at Patton in disbelief. Patton smiled.

“He did it,” Patton said for Virgil, who was in too much shock to say anything. Virgil grinned at the words. Roman looked down at Virgil.

“You did it huh?” Roman said, pulling Virgil to his feet, “I knew you could,” He said, before pulling Virgil into a tight hug.

“Logan you smarty pants,” Patton said as Logan walked away from Virgil and Roman. Logan smiled triumphantly. Patton felt Logan’s feelings of pride, in himself and Virgil and all of them, for a moment before making up his mind. He stood on his toes and gave Logan a quick peck on the lips.

Logan was shocked for a moment, before he leaned down and returned the kiss quickly. Virgil and Roman separated, and so did the others, neither seeing the intimate moment the other pair had shared.

“Shall we try again?” Logan asked, still flushed from the kiss.

Virgil looked at him, his eyes wide. Sure, he had done it, and that was great, but he was so tired. He knew he could do it now, but that also did not erase the fear. But he didn't want to disappoint the others… Thankfully, Patton cut in, feeling Virgil’s inner turmoil.

“I think that’s enough for tonight, let's end on a high note!” Virgil nodded and Logan looked at Patton in confusion.

“A high note?” He asked, “But we did not end on a high note, we ended on a successful attempt…” Patton rolled his eyes affectionately.

“It’s a phrase Logan,” Patton sighed, “It isn’t literal.”

“Oh, well, it is a very odd phrase,” Logan said, embarrassed as they headed downstairs from the roof, Virgil and Roman trailing behind.

“You did really great tonight, dark and gloomy,” Roman said quietly to Virgil.

“Yeah, whatever,” Virgil replied, trying to hide his smile.

“I mean it,” Roman continued, “tonight was a huge step in the right direction.”

Virgil glanced up at Roman, trying to hide his blush as he said, “yeah, I guess it was.” Roman gave Virgil’s hand a squeeze, and went to pull his hand away, but Virgil held it there, and they continued to follow the others in silence, the comforting presence of each other saying more than words.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Next chapter is a long one, I'll probably post it tomorrow, so keep an eye out for that!!!


	6. Virgil goes on a date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pretty fluffy. It is also a lot longer than my other chapters, I hope you enjoy!!!  
> Trigger warnings,  
> Just some general anxiety, cause it's Virgil

The group spent the rest of the evening hanging out, before Logan and Patton left, and Roman and Virgil went up to bed. Once they were in bed, Virgil started talking,

“I just want you to know… I heard what you said last night, and it means a lot that you care about me like that.”

“Of course we care about you like that,” Roman replied without hesitation, “and I will keep saying it until you believe it.” Virgil nodded, looking around the dim, cluttered room. He should feel safe right now, but after all the emotional effort of earlier, he was just tired and scared. He snuggled deeper into his blankets, trying to hide from the monsters in the shadows. “You okay V?” Roman asked, noticing the change in Virgil’s behavior.

“M’fine,” Virgil mumbled.

“Clearly that is not the case,” Roman replied, “what can I do?” Virgil shrugged. “Pressure helps, right?” Roman asked. Virgil nodded slightly. “Okay, then we’ll do that, I’m coming onto your mattress, okay?” Virgil didn’t move, and Roman continued slowly. He got under the blankets carefully and wrapped his arms around the smaller boy. Virgil immediately relaxed into him and snuggled up against him like a cat. Roman chuckled. Virgil’s breathing had slowed down and Roman had assumed he was asleep when Virgil spoke,

“Will you stay here?” Virgil asked, “once I fall asleep?”

Roman grinned, “What, like a boyfriend?”

“Sure,” Virgil sighed, “Whatever you wanna call it.”

“Of course I’ll stay my chemically imbalanced romance,” Roman replied, holding Virgil tighter against him, “of course I will stay.”

Virgil woke the next morning with a start to Roman’s alarm. Roman woke slower, but the waking process was sped up by Virgil pushing him and mumbling something about noise. Roman chuckled and turned off his alarm before turning back to Virgil, who was facing away from him anxiously.

“Wanna talk about it?” Roman asked.

“What are we?” Virgil replied.

“Boyfriends…?” Roman replied questioningly.

Virgil sighed, “That sounds great and all but… I’m not good at that stuff. I can’t do big romantic gestures or too much touchy feely, at least not at this point.”

“I’m okay with that as long as you are okay with having an open relationship,” Roman replied casually. Virgil glanced up quickly in surprise to see Roman grinning.

“Uh.. yeah, yeah that sounds… good.” Virgil replied.

“Wonderful. Well, I need to get dressed, have Remus lead you to another bathroom, because at this point by the time I am done you won’t have any time.” Virgil rolled his eyes, but found that he was smiling. Maybe things could keep getting better for him. Maybe he wouldn’t have to live his life in fear forever.

School went fairly smoothly that day. Virgil found himself a lot less anxious in the classes he had with Roman. Roman kept glancing back at him and giving him funny or cute looks that would make Virgil smile.

Patton and Logan were also holding hands Virgil noticed, which was a new, but adorable, development. Overall, things were looking up for Virgil, to the point where he had some extra confidence and wanted to do something he had always wanted to do, but had always been afraid of doing.

Once they had gotten back to Roman’s house and eaten a snack, Virgil decided it was now or never.

“So, I had this idea,” Virgil started, looking at Roman through his boring brown bangs.

“And what was the idea?” Roman asked.

“Well, its kinda stupid, but…”

“But…?”

“Well, I've always wanted to dye my hair purple,” Virgil said, looking down, “I was wondering if maybe you’d help me do that?”

“Oh my goodness absolutely!” Roman yelled, jumping up from the table and causing Virgil to flinch at the sudden movement, “Sorry, it’s just such a wonderful idea, you would look great with purple hair, what are you thinking, streaks, bangs, full head?”

“Bangs,” Virgil mumbled, embarrassed.

“Perfect, just what I was thinking! We can go out and get it done tonight, I have the most wonderful hairdresser, you will love her…” Roman continued to ramble as Virgil questioned his decision. Was this really a good idea, did he really need to stand out more? But when he saw Roman’s excitement and felt the flicker of happiness in his own chest, he knew it was the right choice. 

And that is how Virgil found himself standing in front of a mirror at a salon later that evening, staring in shock at his reflection.

Virgil was extremely thin (which was not well hidden by his oversized clothes) and average height. He was very pale and had gray eyes, except for a small section in his right eye that was purple. And suddenly that purple section of his eye was even more obvious, brought out by the vibrant purple bangs that now hung over his face.

Roman was practically swooning. He was throwing compliments in every direction, flirting shamelessly and causing Virgil to blush.

Virgil wasn’t so sure. He loved it, he really really did, he was just scared of standing out more. When he voiced this fear to Roman, he replied,

“As someone that spends his life standing out, I can guarantee you it is so worth it. Plus, you are so edgy and anti-social, even if people notice you more I doubt they will be brave enough to approach you or say anything.”

That last part made Virgil smile. Roman was right, and after that, Virgil gave in to how excited he was about it. It may only seem like a small step, but for Virgil, doing something like this was huge, and Virgil knew it, and so did Roman, and he was so proud.

The next day at school, the four met up in the hall before class (Roman’s doing), as they wanted to see Virgil’s new hair.

“Oh my goodness kiddo you look so good!” Patton exclaimed.

“I must admit it does suit you,” Logan said, “And this action shows much improvement as well. I am proud of you Virgil.”

Virgil smiled sheepishly, looking at them through his purple bangs, “Yeah, it’s kinda great, isn’t it?”

“Of course it is,” Roman said, sliding his arm around Virgil’s waist. Virgil leaned into the taller boy. Logan and Patton joined hands.

“Oh!” Patton exclaimed suddenly, causing Virgil to jump, “Sorry Virgil, I just had an idea. We should go on a double date! Wouldn’t that be fun!”

“That sounds marvelous Patton!” Roman replied. “We can do it tonight at my place, there is plenty of space, and not many people there!” Virgil glanced at Roman gratefully while Patton nodded excitedly.

“That work for you babe?” Patton asked, looking at Logan. Logan blushed at being called babe, and just nodded, too flustered to form proper words, “Then it’s a date!” Patton said. 

They didn’t get to talk much longer, as soon the bell rang and they had to go to class. Patton had the same first period as Virgil, so they walked together. They didn’t talk as Virgil was lost in his thoughts. This was his first real date, what would be expected of him? What if he messed up? What if everyone had a horrible time because of him?

“You know, it’s my first real date too,” Patton said, breaking the silence. Virgil looked at him in confusion, “Well I may not be able to read your mind, but I can feel your emotions silly, and I’m not an idiot.” Virgil sighed.

“I just have a habit of screwing up everything good in my life, I don’t wanna screw this up too,” Virgil said.

“Well you won’t,” Patton said definitely.

“How do you know?” Virgil asked.

“I just do,” Patton replied as they got to the classroom.

It was such a simple answer, with no good reasoning or evidence, yet for some reason, it did make Virgil feel a little better. Patton smiled to himself as he felt the nervous energy beside him lessen. Tonight was going to be great, Patton could feel it.

That night they all met at Roman’s at 6PM. Virgil had spent the last few hours sitting at the table nervously, while Roman set up. Occasionally, Roman would ask Virgil his opinion on something to try and include him, but Virgil just shrugged. Roman had everything set up by 5:30, and it looked great.

Roman had put a flower arrangement of blue, purple and red roses in the center of the table. The table also had a long red cloth down the middle, like a red carpet. Virgil didn’t understand the point of it, but it looked nice. Two places were set up on either side of the table with nice china plates and silverware. Roman rarely called on his parent’s housekeepers to do things, but he didn't know how to cook much, so he had the cook make them a nice meal of pork, mashed potatoes and egg noodles. Virgil had to admit, it was pretty nice.

The moment Roman finished setting up, he ran upstairs to get ready. Virgil commented that he didn’t have anything nice to wear, but Roman said he looked amazing as always. Virgil didn't believe him, but honestly he just really didn't want to dress nice, so he went with it while Roman promised to take him shopping soon.

That is how Virgil ended up sitting at a large empty table, set for a date, watching the cook make dinner all alone. This may sound depressing, but honestly, Virgil enjoyed it. He hadn’t gotten a relaxed moment to himself in a while, and it felt really nice.

It ended all too soon however, when Patton and Logan knocked. Virgil heard Roman call from upstairs,

“Virgil, answer the door, I’m almost ready!” Virgil rolled his eyes and got up to answer the door. When he saw the other two, he did a double take.

Patton looked amazing. He was wearing a gray button down hanging over some dark jeans. He wore a loose light blue sweater along with a silver necklace with a paw on it. His eyes sparked behind his glasses, even more visible as Patton had brushed his hair back, so none of it was falling in his face.

Logan looked absolutely beautiful. He was in a dark blue button down tucked into some jeans. He wore a lighter blue tie, but this time he also had a black vest that made his sharp jawline stand out even more. His black hair was also combed back, and his eyes stood out starkly against his face.

Virgil felt the blush rising in his cheeks as he fiddled with his regular oversized hoodie, t-shirt, and ripped jeans, suddenly feeling very self conscious, and very much acting like a disaster gay as he stood here, staring at the two, not saying anything. Yep, Virgil was definitely poly too.

After a moment, Virgil snapped out of it and stepped back, letting the two in. He showed them to the table and they sat down. Virgil sat across from Logan as they waited for Roman.

“You guys look really nice,” Virgil finally said.

“Aww, thanks kiddo, you look nice too,” Patton replied with a smile.

“Your compliment is appreciated.” Logan replied.

“Sorry I didn't dress up…” Virgil muttered, “I don’t exactly have much…”

“Don’t worry about it kiddo, you being here is enough,” Patton said so earnestly that Virgil looked up. Patton smiled.

“I agree with Patton,” Logan added, “Your presence is all that is required.” Virgil began to smile as he looked at the other two. They really did like him and care about him for him, not just for some clothes or anything, but for him..

The moment was interrupted by Roman waltzing in, “Hello my friends, sorry for my lateness, beauty like this takes time.” The other three looked up at him, and a blush rose in Virgil’s cheeks.

Roman was wearing a red button down shirt with a gold vest and white tie. He also wore a white suit jacket over top. He wore dark jeans as well, however he had also put on some makeup, red lipstick, mascara, and red eyeshadow. On top of that he had styled his hair so it fell over his forehead in tight brown curls.

“Wow Roman,” Patton said, the first to break out of their collective shock, “You look absolutely suitacular!”

“Patton, you used that pun on me earlier,” Logan sighed, glancing away from Roman.

“Yes, because you both look so good!” Patton replied, his smile growing even larger, which Virgil hadn’t thought was possible.

Roman smiled and sat down, and the food was served. Virgil still had not spoken, he was just staring at his plate, trying not to look at the others for fear of a gay breakdown. He heard the others talking and began to eat, pretending that was why he was not joining the conversation.

“So, Virgil, you’re being awfully quiet, what do you have to say about Frozen?” Logan asked, forcing Virgil to look up at the others again. He blushed, and hid his face behind his hands as he spoke.

“I don’t know. I mean, I kinda relate to Elsa, running away from all of her problems to build an ice castle to live in forever, sounds kinda nice.” Virgil shrugged. “Not to be too edgy or anything." He added.

“I dunno,” Patton said, ignoring the last part of Virgil’s comment. “It seems kinda lonely to me.”

“Yeah, but you could make friends whenever you want, like Olaf,” Virgil said, pulling his hands away from his face as he got into the conversation, “You wouldn’t have to worry about socializing with new people that may not like you, because you create them, so they have to like you.”

The four continued debating the pro’s and con’s of living in isolation in an ice castle forever before more serious topics of conversation came up. Not too serious, but more serious than Frozen.

“So…” Roman asked, “How long have you two been together without telling us, hmm?”

“Only since Monday,” Logan replied calmly, although his face began to turn red at the memory of Patton kissing him, “What about you two?”

“We discussed it on Tuesday, but honestly I feel like we got together the first night Virgil stayed here,” Logan raised his eyebrows, and Roman hastily added, “No, no, not like that, nothing like that, no, we haven’t even kissed yet, I just mean…”

Virgil shrank in his seat, his face turning red as Roman rambled on, flustered.

“We just talked is all, okay? It was Tuesday morning when we officially decided to be in an open relationship together though.” Roman finished, his face bright red.

“That is interesting. Patton and I are also keeping our relationship open," Logan replied, looking at Patton. “Is that correct?”

“Yeppers,” Patton said with a grin, “Which means you two can join whenever you’d like!”

Roman’s eyes widened and Virgil shrank even further into his seat, blushing hard. “Wha-what are you talking about?” Roman stuttered.

“Aww, come on, I can read all your emotions, and there is some serious crushing going in all directions at this table right now, figured I’d just speed up the process.” Patton said, trying to keep from giggling. Him and Logan had discussed wanting to keep their relationship open in case Roman or Virgil had any interest, and when Patton felt it coming from them, well, he just couldn’t help himself!

Finally, Roman spoke. “Well, I guess if everyone is interested, it wouldn’t hurt…” He glanced at Virgil, who was staring intensely at the polished wood floor. 

“Excellent. Though Patton was quicker than expected with bringing it up, I would enjoy the idea of combining our relationships. Virgil?” Logan said.

Virgil glanced up at the others from under his bangs in shock, “Wait, me too?” He asked. Sure, he liked them all, a lot, as Patton had so kindly pointed out, but he didn’t think they’d want to be in a relationship with him. He was always bringing them down, making things more complicated. He couldn’t even dress nice for a date, why would they want him?

“Yes, you too silly!” Patton replied happily.

“But why?” Virgil asked before he could stop himself.

“Because we like you.” Patton replied simply. Normally this would not be enough to convince Virgil of anything, but he wanted this so bad, that he let it be enough.

“Okay, then sure,” Virgil muttered, glancing at the other three, “I guess that would be nice.” The other three smiled, and Virgil did too. Maybe things were really starting to look up for him.

The rest of that date went well. There were a lot of cheesy, lovey puns from Patton and Roman attempting to make romantic gestures with the flowers from the centerpiece, which did not go well. Had he knocked over the vase? ...maybe. But it gave the others a good laugh. All too soon, it was time for Logan and Patton to head home.

“Well, this was nice, we should do this again!” Patton said as they stood at the door.

“Definitely,” Roman replied, “I had a really great time.”

“This was a pleasant experience indeed,” Logan agreed. He paused before adding, “I believe it is common to end an enjoyable date with a goodbye kiss, if I am not mistaken.” Logan said, a blush rising on his face. 

“So subtle Logan,” Roman rolled his eyes and gave the other boy a kiss. Logan blushed even harder.

“You just have to ask,” Patton said affectionately, giving Logan a kiss before leaning over to give Roman one. The three were all blushing madly when they turned to Virgil. Virgil stuck his hands in his pockets and rocked on his heels. He didn’t want to say no. He wanted to be able to give them what they wanted, but he couldn’t. He wasn’t ace, he felt the attraction and he wanted to do things, but he couldn't. He couldn’t let himself get that close to someone. He just wasn’t in a place yet where he could be that vulnerable with someone else. Before Virgil got a chance to speak, Patton interrupted.

“How about a hug?” He suggested, opening his arms and smiling at Virgil. He knew Virgil was anxious about kissing, though he didn’t know why, but that was okay. In Patton’s mind, a hug was just as good. Virgil nodded gratefully and stepped into the other boy’s arms, wrapping his arms around him. They both smiled,

After also getting a hug from Logan and Roman (despite Logan pointing out that they would still be with each other all night), Patton and Logan left, and the date was officially over. Roman sighed as he closed the door behind him.

“That was magnificent,” Roman said with a smile, “But now I am tired. How about I have the housekeeper clean up the date and we just head to bed?” 

Virgil sighed in relief. He was also exhausted from their evening. He really enjoyed hanging out with the others, but at the same time, socializing really tired him out sometimes. “Yeah, that sounds good.” Virgil said after a moment. Roman smiled and turned to go upstairs and Virgil followed, excited for tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed!! Next chapter stuff starts going down, so be prepared!! I also am not done with the next chapter yet, my posting has caught up with my writing, so my posting schedule may become more irregular, sorry in advance!!!


	7. Virgil's fight or flight reflexes kick in

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I'm back!! I can't wait to keep this story going! I was a little stuck on the plot, but thanks to some help from my significant other, I have the rest of this story planned out and ready to write. I hope you all enjoy this chapter, and I apologize in advance for what happens!!   
> Trigger warning:  
> Panic attack, mention of abusive parents, mention of social workers, unconscious self-harm.   
> Let me know if I missed anything!!!

All too soon, it was Friday, the end of a perfectly good week. Yet, while Virgil usually would be dreading the weekend, and the aimless wandering it would lead to, he found himself excited this time. He would get to hang out with Roman and his other  _ boyfriends _ . It was gonna be great.

Virgil should have known better. As always, the second he began to look forward to something, that something was ruined.

Virgil had never been a great student, but he wasn’t a trouble maker either, so when he was called to the office during second period, he was somewhat confused, and extremely scared. He was going through possibilities in his mind, had they found out about his situation and called a social worker (which even Logan had said would be pointless at his age, there was no way he would be adopted before 18), were they gonna expel him, were his parents here, had his powers been discovered!? He glanced at Logan and Roman on his way out, and let's just say the look on Logan’s face was not exactly reassuring.

Virgil dragged his feet as he headed to the office, knowing he was walking toward his doom, when he heard quick footsteps behind him. He turned to see Logan running after him.

“Virgil, wait, don’t go in there,” Logan panted as he caught up. Logan grabbed his wrist and dragged him into the bathroom, looking panicked.

“Logan…” Virgil started, “I am too worried about the current situation to get mad about you looking into my future, so tell me, what is happening?”

“We need to wait for Roman and Patton. Roman will excuse himself in a few minutes and go get Patton with the illusion of a teacher's note like we have done in the past. I will explain the situation once they arrive.”

Virgil spent the next few minutes fidgeting. He started digging his nails into his fingertips, but Logan noticed and grabbed his hands. Virgil distracted himself by tracing patterns onto the back of Logan’s hand, and he didn’t object. After what felt like an eternity, the others arrived.

“Logan, what is going on?” Roman said at the same time as Patton saying “What’s going on kiddo?”

“We have a situation,” Logan stated. They all stared at him as he took a deep breath and continued, “Virgil’s parents have reported his powers, and there are people in the office here to get him.” Virgil’s eyes widened.

“Shit…” He muttered, “I should have known this would happen. Do they know about you guys?”

Logan hesitated before he replied, “No, they do not.” Virgil sighed in relief.

“Okay, then the solution is easy. I will let them take me and you guys will just have to be extra careful.” Virgil began to stand up when Logan grabbed his arm. Virgil flinched, but paused.

“We will not allow that Virgil,” Logan said.

“Look, I am not gonna let you guys expose yourselves to save me!” Virgil yelled. “They are gonna get suspicious if I don’t show up soon. Just let me go, and you guys can live your lives without me.”

“But we can’t kiddo,” Patton said quietly from his place on the floor, “Our lives wouldn’t be the same without you. They would be much worse.”

“I second that,” Roman said, “We are not letting you turn yourself in. I happen to have the power of illusion. I can get them to leave without you, and we will figure it out from there.”

Virgil glanced at Logan, who shrugged, “Even if I did have enough control to see this instance, the future is too uncertain for me to get an accurate look at what will happen.” Virgil sighed.

“If you do that Roman, then they will know there is someone else.” Virgil kneeled in front of Roman and grabbed his hands, looking directly into his eyes, which he did not do often, “And I could not live with myself if you, any of you, got hurt because of me.” Virgil stood up, “I’m sorry guys, this is something I just can’t let you do.”

Virgil then let the anxiety he had been feeling since his name was called overwhelm him. He went weightless. He allowed the panic to control his powers and took advantage of his boyfriend’s momentary distraction. He ran from the bathroom and to the office, breathing rapidly. He did not think this through, he couldn’t go in until he turned visible, and he couldn’t do that until he calmed down, and by then the others would have definitely caught up. 

Not knowing what to do, Virgil’s fight or flight reflexes kicked in. Virgil quickly pulled out a pen and paper and wrote a note, “Find Virgil Tempest at the main library on Saturday at noon.” He then knocked on the door and set the paper on the floor where they would find it, and he ran.

He didn’t make it far because he couldn’t breath. He found himself in the janitor's closet before he collapsed. At least the fight or flight part of his brian had taken over. He worked on slowing his breathing. He would have to get out soon or they would find him. And Logan would surely see tomorrow, shit, he hadn’t thought of that, he had been in too much of a panic.

Virgil pushed out those thoughts and focused on his breathing. He couldn’t deal with any of this until he calmed down.

He thought back to Logan. What would Logan have him do? Focus on breathing, right? Or listen to music? Or do a breathing exercise? What was first? Shit, now Vigil was thinking about Logan, Logan was probably so mad at him. They all probably were, really. He was such a shitty boyfriend they probably never wanted to see him again…

Virgil’s breaths got shorter and his heart rate accelerated even more as he let these thoughts get out of hand. He was such an idiot. His boyfriend's feelings could wait, for now he had to get himself under control, for their safety.

Virgil went with the first thing that had popped into his head and focused on his breathing. He used the breathing exercise Logan often walked him through.

In for four.

Hold for seven.

Out for eight.

Virgil felt slightly more in control, so he did it again.

In for four.

Hold for seven.

Out for eight.

He could breathe again, although his heart was still racing and the attack definitely wasn’t over. This was made even more clear by the fact that he was still invisible, which Virgil had to take advantage of before he breathed through the rest of the attack.

Virgil forced himself to his feet and peeked out of the closet. No one was nearby, so Virgil sprinted down the hall and out of the school, running to the nearby park he used to spend the night in. There was a nice large bush there that he could hide in.

As he ran, his thoughts continued drifting back to what he had done in the bathroom. He had tricked them. He had ignored their opinions. He had left them.

But it was for their safety, he reminded himself again and again, he had to protect them. His mind wandered back to Roman’s words, “Let us protect you.” Virgil had said he understood. Virgil had said he would try. Virgil had betrayed them.

Virgil collapsed into the bush, exhaustion and lack of breath finally taking over his fight or flight reflexes. Virgil tried to push the thoughts out of his head as he once more focused on his breathing.

In for four.

Hold for seven.

Out for eight.

Virgil noticed pain in his fingertip where he had been digging his nail into the skin without noticing. He immediately pulled his fingers apart and dug for something else to fiddle with. He had done enough harm to his boyfriends for one day.

It took a while, but eventually Virgil calmed down enough that he flickered back into visibility. He still stayed in the bush, not ready to face the real world or the consequences of what he had done. Instead of getting up, he put on his headphones and listened to music. Eventually, the sky began to darken. Virgil took out a snack from what Roman had packed him and ate it. He would not be returning to the house tonight. He had to rest, and then he had a meeting at the library, and he was not going to let the others stop him.

Logan, Patton and Roman had gone back to class after Virgil left, knowing they could not address the issue then without consequences. Plus, a few moments after Virgil had left, Logan saw that he was not turning himself in until tomorrow at the library, so they had time.

The three met after school to make a plan. They went to Roman’s house, hoping Virgil would come to spend the night despite Logan saying it wasn’t going to happen (he hadn’t seen it, he had tried but though he often got lucky, he still did not have good control over what events he saw, but they all knew Virgil well enough to know he wasn’t gonna show up).

Once they all sat down at the table, the tension in the air finally snapped as Roman slammed his fists on the table. “I’m gonna kill Virgil’s parents, who’s in?”

“Now,” Patton started, “I don’t support violence, however, in this case some form of kidnapping and trial seems in order.”

“And how would that help our current situation?” Logan asked, eerily calm, not letting his inner anger and turmoil show.

“It would help me,” Roman said. “It would help me to hurt the people that hurt my boyfriend.”

“Our boyfriend,” Patton corrected, trying to keep himself in control. He could feel all the rage moving around the table. Anger at Virgil, anger at his parents, anger at the people who wanted to take Virgil away. He felt it all. Finally, he stood up and snapped, “I’m gonna go find him. Now.” Patton began to walk to the door but Logan grabbed his wrist to stop him.

“He is relatively safe until tomorrow morning,” Logan said, “for now, we need to come up with a plan. Virgil is not gonna be easy to convince to let us help him. In fact, we may not be able to convince him at all. We need to plan a work around to get him out safely.”

Patton sighed and sat back down. Roman stared at the table silently. Logan continued. 

“I believe we must go about this in a way that does not involve Virgil’s consent in us saving him. I believe we will have to do a plan that will work without his knowledge in order to force him out of this situation.”

“You’re right,” Roman sighed, “But when we do save him, I’m gonna kill him.”

Patton chuckled half heartedly, “Yeah, okay, let's do it.”

The three spent the rest of the evening hammering out a plan to save Virgil. The sun went down as they continued talking, Logan even sketched out a map of the library, or, more of a blueprint, as the drawing person in their group was currently MIA. Eventually, they all decided to go to bed, praying the plan would work. Logan tried to see it, but he was too tired and ended up just seeing past Virgil events, many that he didn’t want to know had happened. 

They all stayed at Roman’s to be ready in the morning. They woke at 7, knowing they needed to get there and scout out their spots before Virgil or the others showed up. Finally, Virgil walked up to the path, heading for the front of the library, at exactly noon, where the people were waiting, ready to take him away. The people had not yet seen Virgil. Logan signaled to the others, and the plan began.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for reading, and sorry for the cliffhanger! I do have the next chapter written though, it just needs to be edited, so I should have it up sometime tomorrow!  
> If you are interested, my significant other also writes sanders sides fanfiction and posts it on AO3. Their username is saibug1022, and I definitely recommend checking them out. Cicatrize is one of my favorites of theirs!!  
> Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it, and sorry again for what happened!!!


	8. Remus sets Virgil straight (even though Virgil is gay)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!!! I'm back today, as I said!! I am so excited for this chapter and I hope you guys enjoy it. I haven't written a lot of Remus, so I had a lot of fun writing the part that he is in here, and I'm really proud of it, so I hope you guys like it too!!!  
> Trigger warnings:  
> anxiety attack, abuse mentions, yelling, cussing  
> let me know if I missed anything!!!

Once Virgil was in sight of the government men, he saw movement out of the corner of his eye. Someone was running in his direction. Virgil tensed up as he continued walking, pretending not to see whoever it was. As he reached the table the men were standing by, the other person reached him. Finally, Virgil turned his head and looked. It was Patton. He gave Virgil a small smile as he stood by him, grabbing his shoulder and causing Virgil to flinch. The men gave a confused look as Patton took his hand away with an apologetic yet mischievous look in his eyes. He wasn’t a good liar, but after a night of practice and with his current determination, Patton was sure he could pull this off.

“Oh, sorry Virgil,” Patton rambled quickly, “I forgot how sudden contact scares you,” He glanced at the men and saw them watching curiously and continued, “Did your parents call and lie again to get you hurt and away from them.” Patton sighed, “We have got to get you out of that house” He murmured to himself, but loud enough for the men to hear. Patton turned to the men, rolling his eyes and feeling their curiosity and concern continue to rise. He bit back a smile, it was working. “What did they say this time?” Patton asked with a dramatic sigh.

“That is classified information,” one of the men said. Patton could tell this man wasn’t going to tell him anything, but the man was also seriously questioning the truthfulness of the information they had received. “You say this has happened before?” The man asked.

“Yes,” Patton sighed, glancing at Virgil with a sad and concerned look in his eyes. It didn’t take much acting for that look to seem real, because it was real. Patton could feel the anxiety coming off of him in waves as he glanced back and forth between Patton and the men. Patton had to get him out before it overwhelmed him and activated his powers. “His parents often hurt him. Despite that, Virgil refuses to leave them cause they are his parents. By doing these things to force him to be taken away, they are convinced they will hurt him even more.”

“Is this true Virgil?” The man turned and looked at Virgil. Patton felt the anxiety flow over and saw Virgil flicker as he grabbed his hand, trying to make the man not notice due to the movement. The man looked confused, but didn’t say anything. Patton continued to hold Virgil’s hand, hard, trying to help ground him. Suddenly, Patton noticed Logan walking their direction. This meant the other two had seen what had nearly happened. They were on plan B.

“There you two are,” Logan said, “I was worried they’d taken him already.” Logan adjusted his glasses and reached out to shake the government workers hands. There were three men total, though only one had spoken so far. “Nice to meet you. I am Logan Berry. My friend Virgil here has been in these situations before, and I have been working on finding the correct authorities to help him, but he is too scared to ever admit what is happening to him. Perhaps you can help.”

“I am afraid that is not our job,” The men said, “we are just here to apprehend a suspect, and unless we have solid evidence of what you are saying, we have no choice but to take him.”

Virgil flickered again, but the men were looking at Logan and didn’t notice.

Roman was watching all of this go down from his hiding place in a bush a few yards away. He knew, he  _ knew _ he needed to trust the others. He knew that using his powers would be bad, as they would know other people existed. But… if this went on much longer they were gonna notice the flickering. They were gonna be caught.

“Why, we do have evidence,” Logan said calmly, trying to ignore Patton’s panicked look as he tried to communicate to Logan that Virgil could not hold out much longer. He was aware of the situation. “Virgil,” Logan said carefully, knowing that if Virgil refused or flickered again in this moment the plan would be ruined, “Will you show these nice men your scars?”

Virgil glanced up in shock. He hadn’t even shown his boyfriends the scars scattered around his torso, and Logan just expected him to show these complete strangers. Then Virgil saw the look in Logan’s eyes, desperate, pleading. Slowly, Virgil nodded and pulled up his shirt, biting his lip as he tried to keep his powers at bay.

The men looked at Virgil’s torso critically, and Patton glanced at it too. Logan was also looking and gods he couldn’t do it he couldn’t do it this was all too much. 

Logan watched as Patton’s eyes widened. Logan spoke, trying to get them to look away from Virgil, but it was too late. Virgil flickered once more, clearly having a harder time staying visible as it took him a moment longer to be seen again. All three men were looking at him, there was no way he missed it. Their eyes widened, and when Virgil saw the shock on their faces, he turned entirely invisible, unable to hold it at bay anymore.

Logan looked over at Logan before looking back at the men, making sure to clear his and Patton’s names before Roman stepped in. He looked at Patton, who got the memo and immediately let go of Virgil’s hand in fake shock.

“Virgil?” He asked in a fearful voice, not difficult at the moment, as he was terrified. 

“Well this was unforeseen,” Logan commented, Patton biting his lip to keep himself from pointing out the pun Logan had just made on accident. Logan continued, “I must admit you were correct in wishing to find him. I apologize for our interruption in your investigation.”

“No worries,” The man said, “We just need to find him and take him into custody.”

That is when Roman stepped in, creating the illusion of Virgil reappearing, and allowing the men to take the illusion with him. Once they left, Roman stepped out of the bushes to find an extremely distressed Patton and Logan. They both appeared to be holding onto Virgil’s arms (though Roman couldn’t tell for sure as Virgil was still invisible), restraining him and keeping him from running. Neither of them seemed happy about it.

Roman walked over to them and felt around for Virgil for a moment, eventually finding him and pulling him into a hug. Virgil tried to push away, small gasps coming from his mouth, but he was too distraught and weak. Roman loosened his grip to reposition himself to pick Virgil up. The three of them took him back to Roman’s house, knowing that the situation was nowhere near over.

Once they got Virgil back to the house, they steered the still invisible boy to the couch and sat him down. One of them kept contact with him at all times, so as not to lose him. Virgil had not said a word.

Logan and Patton went to get snacks and set up the table for another planning session while Roman stayed with Virgil, patiently awaiting his return to visibility (Logan had gotten him breathing, but his anxiety was still too high). Patton could feel Virgil’s anxiety and anger from the kitchen. He knew what was coming, he just didn’t want to think about it.

Once the table was set up and Virgil was flickering again, the three sat down, leading Virgil to join them. Virgil still stayed quiet.

Virgil wasn’t just mad, he was pissed the fuck off. He told them not to do anything, and they ignored him and now look where they were! They should have just listened to him, yet instead they put their own safety at risk for Virgil, and he had screwed it up. The others began talking, planning, talking about Virgil going into hiding, them being more careful with their powers, and finally, Virgil couldn’t take it anymore. He snapped.

“What the hell were you guys thinking,” He muttered barely above a whisper, looking down at the table.

“What was that Virgil?” Logan asked as the three glanced over at him. Virgil looked up.

“I said, What the HELL were you guys thinking!” He said, deep anger and hurt and fear coloring his voice as he rose from his seat, “This was just ME! They ONLY wanted, hell, they only KNEW about ME! And now, here we are, and your guys’s lives are AT RISK because of ME. YOU SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO ME!” Virgil was yelling now as he stood up, his knuckles white as he gripped the edge of the table, "I SCREW EVERYTHING UP!” he continued, “WHY COULDN’T YOU JUST LET THEM TAKE ME AND BE DONE WITH IT?” Tears were streaming down Virgil's face, but he kept yelling, “you guys are the ONLY PEOPLE I HAVE! YOU GUYS ARE IN DANGER BECAUSE OF ME! I AM DANGEROUS WHY WOULD YOU PROTECT ME?” Virgil’s grip on the table weakened as his deep sobs of fear and anger took over. “W-why would...why would you protect me? I, I need to protect, to protect  _ you _ . This is-this is my, my fault,” Virgil sobbed, collapsing back into his seat. “You, you should have… you should have l-listned to me.”

Everyone at the table was quiet. Logan was looking at Virgil thoughtfully. Roman’s eyes were wide with shock as he looked at Virgil, the quiet scared boy he knew, unable to comprehend that he had just yelled at him. And Patton looked at Virgil with a deep sadness in his eyes, the emotions he felt through Virgil upsetting him deeply. He loved Virgil so much, and so did Logan and Roman, yet Virgil could not see what there was to love. All he saw was his own brokenness, his own weakness. In this moment, Patton so desperately wished Virgil could have his powers, and could feel the emotions in the room. Sure, there was fear and shock, but most of all, there was love. There was so much love and Patton just wanted Virgil to feel it.

The three watched Virgil sob for a while, not knowing what to do. This wasn’t an anxiety attack, which Logan would know how to handle. This was Virgil’s love of the others, his care for them being so strong he couldn’t handle it. He had hurt them, and he didn’t want them to come near him for fear of hurting them more. The others knew this, so they just watched Virgil cry.

A few minutes later, Remus came around the corner, “Hey, I heard some noise, what's going-” He stopped when he saw Virgil, “-on?”

The other three had seen Virgil cry during the few panic attacks they had witnessed, though he tried his best to avoid it. Remus, on the other hand, had never seen Virgil looking this broken. He looked at the others, who hadn’t looked up when he entered. He saw how sad Roman looked as he watched Virgil. Remus had to do something. He walked over to Virgil and put his hands on Virgil’s shoulders. Virgil flinched but didn’t move.

“I’m… I’m so sorry,” He mumbled, still looking at the floor. “I hurt, I hurt  _ your _ b-brother. I, I promised I wouldn’t… but I, I did.”

Remus looked at the others in confusion, but none of them offered an explanation. Fine. He was just gonna have to figure it out himself. He lowered himself down to Virgil’s eye level. “Look at me.” He said, leaving no room for negotiation. Virgil hesitated, then looked up. His eyes were red and puffy from crying, and his eye makeup had run down his face. He looked like a mess. “You better snap out of it right now and tell me what’s going on,” Remus said, “Or I will call our parents.” 

Virgil’s eyes widened. Roman and Remus would get in so much trouble for calling their parents while they were on a work trip. He couldn’t let that happen. He nodded and sniffled, wiping at his eyes with his sleeves, and he explained everything.

Remus had already known the four of them had powers, and he knew Virgil had crap parents, but this was just absurd. “Imma kill your parents.” Remus muttered when Virgil had finished. Virgil glanced at him in surprise.

“But I hurt Roman,” Virgil said, “aren’t you mad at me?”

“Oh, I’m mad at you alright,” Remus chuckled, looking to the side, “You are an idiot and should have just listened to your boyfriends from the start,” Virgil looked surprised, and Remus snorted, “Come on, yeah, it was a risk, but running off like that, really, you thought they’d let you get away with that?” Virgil shrugged.

“So yeah, I’m mad at you,” Remus continued, “However I am abso-fucking-lutely PISSED at your parents. Though you were a moron,” Remus gave Virgil a glare before continuing, “It’s your parents fault this happened in the first place. Roman and I have had our fair share of sucky parenting, but what your parents did... I’ll... I’ll kill them!!” Remus said, getting to his feet.

“But, but it’s my fault,” Virgil muttered, “it’s my fault I have these powers in the first place.”

At that, Remus actually grabbed a plate off the table and threw it. They all looked at him in shock as the plate shattered in the corner. Virgil flinched. Remus hoped it would snap Virgil out of it. “There, you want a punishment for being an idiot, that’s it. A nice scare. Now get your head out of your ass and talk to your boyfriends and make a plan. This isn’t helping anyone.”

Virgil glanced nervously at the glass shards in the corner of the room then back at Remus, who sighed, “Dude, I’m not evil, I’m not gonna hurt you, I’m just trying to snap some sense into you.”

“I’d understand if you were gonna hurt me. I deserve it.”

Remus sighed. Maybe he had come on a bit too strong. He lowered himself back to Virgil’s level and tried again. “Look dude. My brother cares about you, therefore I care about you. Yeah, I’m a little mad at you right now cause you were being an idiot, but I don't blame you. The best thing you can do for me, or any of them,” Remus motioned at the three still sitting at the table. Roman sat with his mouth slightly ajar, while Logan watched curiously and Patton’s eyes were wide in shock, “is to talk to us and help us come up with a plan to deal with the situation from here. No changing the past, only the future, so let’s get to it.”

Virgil hesitated at first, then nodded, taking a deep breath. “Okay,” He sighed, “okay, I’m sorry.”

“I swear to everything both holy and unholy, if you apologize one more time I will lose it.” Remus muttered as he sat down at the table. Virgil went to apologize again but Remus cut him off, “Don’t,” He said as Virgil shut his mouth with a click. Remus turned to look at the rest of the group, “Okay, let’s get planning.”

The plan they came up with was nowhere near safe enough for everyone in Virgil’s opinion, but he had learned his lesson from last time, he was gonna listen to the more emotionally stable people today.

They had decided that Virgil definitely had to go into hiding, and they knew his identity and his power and were actively looking for him. At this point, they likely knew there was another person as well, however they did not know it was Roman, as they had not even seen him at the scene.

They had seen Logan and Patton, Virgil was quick to point out, but Logan pointed out that they seemed fairly convinced that Logan and Patton had no clue these powers existed. That didn’t help Virgil relax.

So, it was determined that the other three would continue going to school as if nothing had happened, being very careful of using their powers. Virgil would stay at Roman’s house, and he was not allowed to leave (unless he had full control of his powers and left invisibly and stayed invisible until he got back, but that seemed a long time off). Logan would also tutor him so he would not fall too behind at school.

Patton could tell Virgil was uncomfortable with the plan, but what other choice did they have. As Logan had pointed out, if they all went into hiding that would draw even more attention to them. Also, as Logan continually stressed, education was vitally important to their growth.

“We still have the rest of the weekend kiddo,” Patton said as he grabbed Virgil’s hand to try and calm him down. “It will be okay, I promise.”

Virgil kept that promise in his mind the rest of the weekend, trying desperately to believe it. He tried to relax, but some part of him just couldn’t. The others tried to help, but eventually, the weekend had to come to a close, and they had to leave, and Virgil would be alone, with nothing but his worries and fears to keep him company.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed that chapter!! If you guys are also reading my self discovery series, I promise I will get back to that soon, I've just been a lot more into this story recently and had a bit of writing block with that one, but I will get back to it. Feel free to leave a comment, I enjoy reading each and every one of them. Thank you guys for reading!!!


	9. Monday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!! Sorry it has been a few days, I started working on this awesome collab and now can't seem to focus on writing any of my other fics! I promise I'll get back to these soon, but in the mean time look out for the first chapter of my collab with saibug1022 coming soon!!! I'll put more details about that in the end notes.   
> trigger warnings:  
> anxiety, overprotective instincts  
> Other than that I think this chapter is pretty trigger free. Let me know if I missed something!!!

Monday came all too quickly, and soon it was time for the three to head to their first day of school with Virgil in hiding. Logan and Patton had spent the weekend at Roman’s knowing that this first day especially would be difficult for everyone, and knowing they needed to stick together.

When they all woke up in the morning, Virgil just groaned and muttered something in his sleep as he rolled over. He did not wake up. Roman wanted to wake him, but Logan said it was best they let him sleep away as much of the school day as possible.

The morning was fairly normal. They all ate breakfast then caught the bus, ready to pretend it was just another normal day at school. Yet the moment they arrived, they knew that would not be possible.

The school was surrounded by government men in black suits with gold badges over their hearts. They were sitting in black vehicles in the parking lot, they were by every door, they were even making people give their name before entering the building. They were looking for Virgil.

“This is not good.” Roman stated as they approached the school, “This is not good at all.”

“While this situation is not desirable, we can hope it is only temporary, as they will eventually give up at the school when they see Virgil is gone. Until then, we must be extra careful, as previously discussed.” Logan said.

“Can you see that they will leave Lo?” Patton asked.

“I see many future events where they are at the school, however I do not know in what timeframe they occur. I am hoping they are all relatively soon, however no, I do not see them leaving,” Logan replied, “However please keep in mind that my powers are not exactly reliable as they are difficult to control. All logic goes to show that they will leave when they do not find Virgil.”

Patton and Roman nodded. They hoped Logan was right.

Virgil woke up around noon in a complete panic. Where were Logan, Patton and Roman? After a moment of panic, Virgil remembered that they were at school, yet that did nothing to ease his concerns.

Were they safe? Had they been discovered? Were they being taken away right now while Virgil sat here doing nothing to help? He should be there, he needed to be there, he had to protect them…

Virgil was spiraling. He knew it. Heck, even Patton probably knew it, though his powers stretched nowhere near far enough for him to feel it. 

Virgil had to calm down. Freaking out like this would do nothing. If they didn’t show up after school then Virgil had every right to freak out, but for now he needed to get his crap together. He can’t let himself do this every day for who knows how long.

‘What would Logan have me do?’ Virgil thought to himself as he slowly sat up to get off his mattress. He would probably tell him to distract himself. Roman’s house had basically anything Virgil could ever need, but he also didn’t want to be rude. Virgil sighed, he was definitely overthinking this. He had his own sketchbook and pencils in the backpack literally right next to him, and Roman’s family was so rich he doubted they would notice if he borrowed a few paints.

Virgil pulled out his sketchbook and pencils and began to draw, channeling his feelings into his art. It started as doodles. He doodled things symbolic to his boyfriends’s personalities. He drew Logan as a outline of a brain with his thick rimmed black glasses, and Patton with the same glasses except as a heart. When he got to Roman he hesitated, then decided he might as well go all out, that is what Roman would do anyways.

He drew an emblem with a whole scene in it, the type of scene Roman would create in one of his illusions. It was a castle under a bright sun and in front of some mountains. In the foreground he drew a path leading from the castles entrance to the ocean with swirling waves. Virgil smiled as he looked at his doodles, then continued.

He drew a cloud around them, protecting them. In the bottom of the page he drew small depictions of all the things he needed to protect them from. He needed to protect them from being captured. He needed to protect them from having their hearts broken. He needed to protect them from himself. Finally, he drew lighting from the cloud around the symbols. Lightning that protected them from the danger coming after them. He was protecting them.

When Virgil was finished, he sat back and looked at his work. Right here in this image in front of him, the people he cared about were safe. Virgil allowed himself a small smile as he leaned back on his bed. They were safe.

The school was an absolute madhouse. Students mingling in the halls, curiously gossiping about what was happening. Some students talking to teachers fearfully, desperately wanting answers that the teachers didn't have.

Patton struggled to resist all the emotions from the other students. He forced himself to close off his mind as he walked to class. Normally he would see Virgil in first period. He would feel his anxiety and smile at him, wanting to comfort him. Today was not a normal day. In fact, Patton wasn’t sure he’d ever get a normal day again.

Logan and Roman had the same subject first period, but with different teachers, so once they reached their hallway, they were forced to part ways. Logan walked into his classroom, different past and future events flashing through his mind as he desperately searched for the end of this nightmare. Roman walked into his classroom wondering, like Patton, when things would be normal again.

Other than the government agents crawling through the halls and the more emotional student body, the day went fairly smoothly. By the end of the day, the three boys were both exhausted and relieved, ready to return to Roman’s and rejoin Virgil. It just wasn’t the same without him.

Back at Roman’s, Virgil was pacing in the living room. He had traced his drawing, then grabbed a snack (he was tired of being yelled at to eat, he just had a small stomach from years of being starved, okay?). Then he had watched some T.V., listened to music, considered playing with his powers and opted to do homework instead (yep, you read that right), though he hadn’t gotten much of it done when his alarm FINALLY went off, signaling the end of the school day, and therefore the imminent arrival of his boyfriends.

And that is how Virgil found himself pacing Roman’s living room 10 minutes after the alarm had gone off, trying not to panic. 

“The final bell rings at 2:30,” Virgil muttered to himself, trying to talk reason into his mind, “By the time they have gotten through the stampede it would probably be 2:35. The walk to the bus stop is about 10 minutes. The ride is another 10 minutes. Then the walk here is about 5 minutes. It is only 2:40. No need to panic until 3:00.”

Virgil continued to pace, muttering the timing over and over again to himself until finally, at 3:05, the people in question walked through the door.

“You’re 5 minutes late.” Virgil stated as he stopped his pacing and stared at the three boys, who stared right back at him. “We normally get here at 3:00. It’s 3:05. I texted you.”

“Our apologies Virgil,” Logan said, carefully walking towards the frightened yet relieved boy, “There are some changes at the school that delayed us that we did not think would be appropriate to convey over text.” Logan looked at Patton expectantly. They had agreed he would explain, as he was the one most in touch with emotions (obviously) and could sense when Virgil had heard too much.

“Virgil,” Patton began, grabbing Virgil’s hand and leading him to the couch, “We need to tell you some things that have changed at the school, but I want you to listen to us before you panic, okay?”

Virgil nodded, beginning to panic already at those words. That meant this was bad, right? That the people he lov-cared about were in danger? He was snapped from his thoughts when Patton began speaking again,

“Government officials are at the school looking for you. They have put in many extra security measures to catch you,” Patton said, pausing as he felt Virgil’s fear.

People were at the school, looking for him? But they knew where he was! Would they hurt them to get information? He couldn’t let that happen. He couldn’t let them keep going to school at the risk of their safety, he just couldn’t!!

“Virgil,” Patton began before Virgil could begin to speak, “Our plan has  _ not _ changed, okay? Everything we discussed before is still true. Us all disappearing would be suspicious, and we need an education. They truly believe none of us knew of your powers. Worst they will do is ask us some stuff about you to try and find you, okay? Nothing has changed.”

Virgil still didn’t like it. He didn’t like it at all. Yet he knew they were right, he just wished he could convince his anxiety of that. He sighed defeatedly.

“I still don’t like it,” He muttered, “but I know you’re right.” He looked down at his hand in Patton’s, “Just,  _ please _ keep me updated, okay? Like, text me throughout the day, especially if you are going to be running late. I just… I just need to know you guys are safe.”

The others nodded. “Of course we can do that,” Roman said kneeling in front of Virgil, “As long as you keep us updated too. We can protect  _ each other _ .” 

Virgil nodded, biting back some self deprecating response about how they shouldn't try to protect him.

“Then it is settled,” Logan said, “We continue as planned until the government workers leave, and then we go from there.” Patton and Roman nodded, while Vigil just looked down at the couch, suddenly seeming to find the fabric of the cushions very interesting.

“If they leave,” Virgil whispered to himself, so quietly that no one else could hear it. But that didn’t mean it hadn’t been said. The doubt was out in the world now, and there was no taking it back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for reading!!  
> A little more detail on the collab:  
> It will be a sanders sides au. saibug1022 and I each write chapters for our accounts, but they overlap from different perspectives, it is actually really cool and fun to write, and I think it is going well. There will be more details once it is posted, but I hope you guys end up checking it out!!  
> Again, thank you guys for reading this chapter and sorry for the wait. Also, sorry in advance for more longer waits before chapters, especially on my part 2 that I am working on right now if you are reading it. I just need to get back into the stories!  
> I appreciate all of you so much!!! Thanks again <3


	10. Christmas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys! Sorry for the wait for this chapter, I have started working on a collab with saibug1022 and haven't had as much time to write my own fics. That is my own fault though, as I am way to obsessed with the story line in this collab and keep prioritizing it despite having enough written for the next like, 10 weeks.  
> Anyways, if you are interested in checking that out, you can find both saibug1022 and my part of the collab in the collection We Can't Keep Running Away From Who We Are, so if you're interested in more sanders sides angst, I recommend you check that out.  
> I will continue to work on this fic (obviously), but it will probably be more of a spaced out updating schedule from here on out, though I will try to update at least once a week.  
> Sorry again for the wait, but I hope you enjoy the Christmas fluff!!!  
> Trigger warnings: mini panic attack, general anxiety, self-depreciating thoughts

Christmas break came around, and still there was no change in the school situation. They all knew they needed to do something about it, as Logan still did not see the government people leaving any time soon, but Patton insisted that they wait until after Christmas, and Roman ageed. Virgil hated that plan, but Logan assured him that a few days would not make a difference at this point.

So, forcing their current life situation out of his mind, Virgil was faced with another, more imminent concern. He couldn’t get his boyfriends any gifts.

He had been thinking about it for weeks, trying to figure out how to get the money to order them things, but he just couldn’t find a way. He couldn’t pick up odd jobs because he couldn’t leave the house unless he was invisible (which he couldn’t do anyways cause his control was still basically nonexistent). He didn’t exactly have any money laying around to use. He couldn’t borrow money from Roman because he wouldn’t be able to pay him back, plus he couldn’t use Roman’s money to get Roman a gift. There was no way he could get them anything for Christmas.

Virgil had been trying to force these thoughts out of his head when around the others, not wanting to concern them. He didn’t want to tell them he couldn’t get them gifts, they would be so upset. They deserved so much better than what Virgil could give them.

The worst part is that Virgil knew what he would have gotten them, and he was pretty sure they would have liked it. He would have gotten Logan this great puzzle book he had seen online. It had word searches and crossword puzzles themed around physics and astronomy, and it had some sudoku as well. 

He would have gotten Roman this eyeshadow palette he had seen online. It was full of red and gold colors that Virgil knew Roman would enjoy experimenting with, both on himself and probably on Virgil at some point.

He would have gotten Remus a new plate, along with a button that made a loud noise when pressed. He would have put a note with it that said, “next time I’m being an idiot, press the button instead of throwing a plate. 

And for Patton he would have gotten him this cute mug he had found. It had little cat ears and whiskers, and it said, “let’s spend  _ fur _ ever together”.

He knew they were all small things, but they matched his boyfriends personalities and at least it would have been  _ something _ . Even if it wouldn’t have been a lot. But now, here Virgil was, helping his boyfriend’s decorate on Christmas eve, with not a single gift for any of them.

He tried to focus on the decorating, as to keep Patton from noticing his distress, but he didn’t miss the concerned looks Patton kept shooting his way. He did however, choose to ignore them.

Virgil quietly put ornaments on the tree, while the other three were trying to guess what they had gotten for each other. Virgil just silently prayed to a god he didn’t believe in that they hadn’t gotten him anything. Of course, things never went how he wanted. 

“Patton, are you absolutely  _ sure _ you didn’t get me that jacket I told you about? I basically told you to get it for me!” Roman whined.

“I’m not gonna tell you kiddo,” Patton teased, “That would ruin the surprise!”

Roman groaned, “Awww, come on! You told me what you got Logan and Virgil!”

Logan cut in, saying something about how that was entirely different than Patton telling spoiling Roman’s gift, but Virgil had stopped listening. Patton had gotten him a gift. Did that mean the others had gotten him something too? But he hadn’t gotten them anything! He was such a horrible boyfriend, he had really fucked up this time.

Suddenly, Virgil noticed the other three were staring at him in concern. “Hey, kiddo, you need to calm down.” Patton said walking slowly toward Virgil. Patton grabbed his hand and that is when he noticed what was going on, he had started flickering.

Shit, this situation really couldn’t get any worse, now could it? He felt Patton pull him over to the couch and sit him down as he heard Logan speaking. He was still only flickering, he could get this under control.

He focused on Logan’s voice as Patton and Roman each held one of his hands, trying to help keep him grounded. 

“Virgil, I do not know what it is that has you so anxious, but I can assure you that we can get through it. You just need to breathe, okay? Follow my breathing, in for four, hold for seven, out for eight, okay?”

Virgil nodded as he followed Logan’s instructions. He focused on the steady and firm pressure on each of his hands. He focused on Logan’s breathing. 

After a few minutes, Virgil’s flickering slowed so that he was for the most part staying visible, and Patton spoke.

“I’m sorry kiddo, I knew you were anxious but you didn’t seem to want to talk about it so I didn’t want to bring it up. I’m sorry I should have done something to help.”

Virgil shook his head, “No, it’s not your fault. You’re right, I don’t wanna talk about it, so let's just get back to decorating and forget this happened, okay?” suddenly, Virgil flickered again, just for a moment, as the thought of tomorrow passed through his mind. Tomorrow, where he would have to admit he hadn’t gotten them anything. Tomorrow, when they would see what a disappointment Virgil truly was.

“We aren't gonna force you to talk, Virgil,” Logan said, “However we are not just going to forget this happened. Especially when you are still in a state of distress.”

“I agree,” Roman said, “although I have a feeling I know what this is about, mind if I take a guess?”

Virgil shrugged.

“Okay. Is this about gifts, Virgil?” Roman said, “because we all understand that you can’t get us anything. None of us are upset.”

Virgil fought the tears welling up in his eyes and didn’t reply. Maybe he hadn’t been as great at hiding his anxiety over it as he had believed. 

“Oh, kiddo, is that really what this is about?” Patton asked. He didn’t wait for a response, as he could clearly tell from Virgil’s emotions that Roman had been correct, “Virgil, we would never be upset with you over something like that. You are in a crazy situation, none of us expected you to get us anything.”

“But…” Virgil started, “but you guys got things for me and... and I couldn’t get you anything. You guys deserve better.”

“Virgil,” Logan spoke up, lifting Virgil’s chin so Virgil would meet his eyes, “you are the only gift we need.”

Virgil gave a small nod, feeling a bit better knowing they didn’t hate him, but still upset with himself. He quickly wiped his eyes on his sleeves, letting go of Patton and Roman’s hands. “Okay, yeah, I guess. Let’s just get back to decorating”

Patton gave him a look, and Virgil knew he wanted to say something else, but he let it go, and soon, the four of them were back up and decorating. They were up until 10PM finishing the tree before Patton and Logan went home, promising to be back tomorrow afternoon for dinner and gifts.

Virgil and Roman went up to bed. Virgil was still sleeping on Roman’s floor, and was glad that Roman hadn’t mentioned him moving to a different room. He always had a hard time sleeping with all of his nightmares, but with Roman there, it made it easier.

Once they were both ready for bed, Roman spoke, surprising Virgil.

“Hey, I know you’re still upset about the gift thing-” Roman started, but Virgil cut him off.

“Look, I really don’t want to talk about it, okay?” Virgil snapped.

“Just, just hear me out, please?” Roman said desperately, “I have an idea that I think would help.”

“I’m not sure anything will help. Nothing will change the fact that I didn’t get you guys anything. But sure, whatever, what’s your idea?”

“Well, I thought maybe you could tell me what you would have gotten us, and maybe I could make an illusion of it for you, so you can still see our reactions and feel like you had gotten us something.”

Virgil looked at Roman in surprise. He was willing to do that for Virgil? But wouldn’t that just make the others more disappointed that Virgil wasn’t able to get it for them. Virgil voiced that second concern to Roman, who did not hesitate in his reply.

“Absolutely not. I love gifts, don’t get me wrong, but if I have learned anything from having parents that send so many gifts but never see me, it is that what makes a gift special isn’t the gift, it is showing that the person was thinking about you, showing that you truly know and care about the other.” Roman said sincerely. “And for my gift you can even write it down for me to see in the morning, that way it is still a surprise.”

Suddenly Virgil felt tears in his eyes once more. He got off his mattress and got into Roman’s bed and wrapped his arms around him. Roman quickly put his arms around Virgil as well as Virgil cried into his shoulder for a few minutes. Finally, Virgil responded, “That would be amazing. Thank you.”

Roman nodded, “nothing to thank me for,” He replied. The two stayed snuggled up like that until the both fell asleep, Virgil feeling better than he had in weeks.

They woke up the next morning to Remus barging into Roman’s room.

“Hey love birds, get your asses out of bed!” Remus yelled. Virgil groaned and slowly rolled off Roman’s bed onto his mattress as he heard Remus run down the stairs. He laid on his mattress, slowly falling back to sleep, before he heard Roman speak. From how close his voice was, he had a feeling Roman had gone to tap him before thinking better of it.

“Virgil, I’m gonna get dressed. Here are 4 slips of paper, you can write our gifts on here, and I’ll look at them when it’s time to open them.” Virgil slowly sat up and nodded and he took the paper from Roman. Once Roman left the room, he wrote down the gifts, folding each slip in half and putting the recipients name on the outside.

For the next couple hours, him, Remus and Roman just hung out. They ate some of the nice food the staff had made. Roman and Remus opened their many presents from their parents, and they watched a movie. They had just finished the movie when they heard a knock at the door. Patton and Logan were here.

Roman answered the door as Virgil felt the slips of paper in his pocket. ‘The actual gift doesn’t matter’ Virgil reminded himself, ‘because this shows you were thinking of them.’

A few minutes later, they were all sitting in a circle. Virgil had four gifts in front of him while the others each only had three. He handed Roman the slips of paper. 

“You wanna do these first or last Virgil?” Roman asked as he took the papers.

Virgil shrugged, “I don’t care. Up to you guys.”

Roman quickly explained the plan to the others, and they all agreed they wanted to do that first, as they were all very excited, Patton especially. 

“Okay Patton, since you are so excited, let’s do you first.” Roman said. Virgil watched nervously as Roman unfolded the piece of paper and smirked. He gave Virgil a quick thumbs up before creating the illusion of the mug. Patton took a moment to look at it, and his face exploded into a smile when he saw the pun. 

“Virgil I love it!” He exclaimed, before leaning over the gifts and tackling Virgil into a hug, causing Virgil to stiffen in surprise before hugging Patton back. “Thank you!”

“Yeah, you’re welcome, “ Virgil said, embarrassed, “I mean, it is just an illusion of what I would have gotten you, so…”

“I know but I still love it, it is a  _ purrfect  _ gift for me,” Patton said, leaning back to give Virgil a smile. Vigil smiled back. 

“I want to go next!” Remus said. Roman opened the slip of paper for Remus and actually laughed. Remus looked at him expectantly, “well, hurry up, I wanna see what it is.”

So Roman created the illusion of the plate and button, then handed Remus the slip of paper, which had the note on it. When Remus read it, he began laughing as well. 

“Oh, you should be glad this isn't real,” Remus gasped between laughs, “or I would be using it way too much!”

At that, Virgil laughed too, and the others soon joined in when Remus read the note out loud. After that Logan and Roman also got their gifts, and they both liked them as well, then they went around opening the real gifts. The other’s got each other some really sweet things. Logan groaned when he opened his gift from Patton to find a tie with cats on it. Roman got the jacket he asked for, but he got it from Logan, as Patton had gotten him another Disney poster. Logan got Patton a book of daily puns, which Virgil couldn’t help but laugh at as he knew Logan would regret it quickly.

Then it was time for Virgil to open his gifts. He was reluctant, but the others were so excited to see his reaction, so finally, he started.

The first gift was from Logan, who had gotten him a new pair of headphones that were sound cancelling, so they would help with Virgil’s anxiety more than his current ones. They were black and fit Virgil perfectly, and he loved them.

From Roman he got a MP3 player, full of Roman doing covers of Virgil’s favorite songs. Virgil rolled his eyes and teased Roman about it, but in reality, it was amazing and he knew he would listen to Roman’s covers more than he wanted to admit. 

From Patton he got a dream catcher. Virgil didn’t really talk about his bad dreams, but Patton said he could feel his fear while he was asleep when they had sleepovers, and he wanted to help. Virgil almost cried as he threw himself at Patton, thanking him again and again.

And finally, Remus got him a black and purple jounal with a note in the cover that read “write in here when you’re thinking of doing something stupid, that way I won’t have to yell at you again.” That made Virgil smile. This was Remus’s way of being caring, and Virgil really appreciated it.

He loved all of it and couldn’t stop thanking them all, until finally Remus yelled at him to shut up, so he did. Virgil may not have been able to get them all gifts in the most conventional way, but they were all happy nonetheless, even Virgil. As they ate their Christmas dinner together, Virgil thought back to his past Christmases. He had never gotten gifts, or had a nice Christmas dinner. They had never decorated the house. Christmas hadn’t meant anything for his family.

But now, he had learned what Christmas meant. It wasn’t about the gifts or the food. It was about showing love and appreciation for your family, whether that family be chosen or by blood. And as they all talked and ate and smiled and laughed, Virgil knew that he had done that, and for the first time in a very long time, he felt truly, really happy. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for reading!!! I hope you enjoyed!!! Make sure to check out my and saibug1022's collab if you're interested!!!


	11. Another plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!! I'm back!!! I wrote this chapter a few days ago but have been feeling really unmotivated to edit it, so here it is in all of is unedited glory cause I finally gave up on finding the motivation. I hope it isn't too bad!!  
> Trigger warnings:  
> Anxiety, PTSD, PTSD attack  
> Let me know if I missed anything!!!

Of course, happiness never lasts, especially not for Virgil. 

Once the holidays were over, they still had a few days of break, thank God. Virgil was so anxious about going back to staying home alone all day. Patton had asked him about it but he had said he didn’t want to talk. Patton respected that, but he could tell the others were all keeping an especially close eye on him.

But they did have something productive they needed to do with these last few days as well. They needed to come up with a plan. The government people had stayed for far to long, with still no sign of leaving. Virgil was panicking, and the others were worried about Virgil’s mental state if this went on any longer, along with potentially being caught, so something had to give. It was the third of January when Logan finally brought this all up.

They had all been sitting in Roman’s living room, Virgil was wearing his new headphones and listening to Roman’s covers on his new MP3 player (not that he was going to tell Roman that). He had his head in Roman’s lap on the couch with Remus sitting next to them, and Patton and Logan were sitting on the floor when Logan stood up and turned to all of them.

“We need a plan,” Logan stated. Virgil pulled down his headphones reluctantly. He didn’t want to have this conversation, but he didn’t exactly have a choice here. He wasn’t about to let them come up with a plan without any of his input.

“Yeah, I think we all know that,” Roman sighed. “I just don’t think any of us have any ideas.”

“Well, I have been brainstorming,” Logan began. “And I believe I have a suitable solution that may work, at least temporarily.”

“Let’s hear it kiddo!” Patton encouraged.

“My suggestion is that we use Roman’s illusion abilities to create a false phone call, in which we will give the government men a false lead on Virgil, so they will depart to follow that lead.” Logan said. “We may have to practice a little move, however with Roman’s improvement over the past couple months with more centralized illusions, I believe this is well within his ability.”

It wasn’t a horrible plan, Vigil had to admit, but it was still insanely risky. What if they figured out it was an illusion? Then, if they didn’t know for sure already, they’d definitely know there was another person nearby with powers. Or what if Roman even got caught while doing it? He could get tested on or hurt or-

“Hey kiddo?” Patton asked, seeming to sense the spiral beginning in Virgil’s mind. “What do you think?”

They were all looking at him expectantly. He realized the others probably already gave their opinions and Virgil had been too busy spiraling to notice.

“I think it’s risky,” Virgil started. “Roman could get caught, and that would make things even worse.”

“We would take precautions to prevent that,” Logan assured him. “Such as making it look like he is preoccupied with something else, and having him at as far of a distance as possible while not hindering his ability to see the illusion he is creating.”

“I dunno…” Virgil said.

“Well kiddo, the rest of us are on board if we do it right, but we can try to come up with something else if you aren’t okay with it.” Patton said. “We won’t be mad.”

“It is a good idea,” Virgil admitted. “And probably one of the less risky things we could do. I mean, I’m not gonna be comfortable with basically any plan involving you guys or our powers, so if you all think it’s the best idea…” Virgil trailed off. He really didn’t like them taking risks, but he had a feeling this was the least reckless route they could take. And he didn’t want to be the one that held them back. Also, if this meant he could start going to school with them again, then maybe it would be worth it. He knew it would be a while and he’d probably have to change some stuff about his appearance, but he would do anything to not have to spend all day every day in this big empty house, alone.

“Hey, I’ve got this Virge,” Roman said, the smile clear in his voice. “We are gonna get you out of hiding and back with us in no time.”

“Actually,” Logan cut in. “Even if the plan works, Virgil will have to stay in hiding for at least a few more months, likely more. Just because they are no longer actively searching here doesn’t mean they won’t check periodically.”

Well shit.

“Could I at least start leaving the house?” Virgil asked desperately.

“Possibly,” Logan sighed then kneeled down in front of Virgil. “Look, I know this has been really hard on you. You’re pacing in the living room every day when we get home, it’s hard to miss the anxiety radiating off of you, even without Patton’s powers. But we have to prioritize your safety. We can help you with panic attacks and loneliness and dark thoughts, but if you got captured…” Logan trailed off.

“I know,” Virgil mumbled. He could see the fear in Logan’s eyes at even the idea, and suddenly felt bad. He felt bad for complaining about the situation because they were doing the best they could. They were only trying to help.

“Okay let’s stop talking about this before this kiddo here starts feeling even worse,” Patton cut in, looking at Virgil with concern. Virgil gave Patton a small smile, but Patton clearly didn’t buy it.

“Alright,” Logan said, settling back onto his spot on the floor next to Patton. “Shall re return to our previous discussion?”

Virgil didn’t know what the previous discussion had been, as he had been listening to his music, and he wasn’t really in the mood to find out, so he just put back on his headphones and tuned the others out. He felt himself spiraling as he thought about all the horrible things that could happen to Roman, and how he was being ungrateful for how much the others were helping him. He should appreciate what they are doing for him, not be freaking out about it and worrying about their every move. He was probably making them feel suffocated, he was keeping them from having fun after school because instead they had to come straight back here to deal with their anxious boyfriend. He shouldn’t be complaining about the situation when it could be so much worse, when they were doing so much for him.

The muffled conversation around him paused, then Roman shifted him off of his lap and got up, leaving the room. Virgil sat up quickly and pulled off his headphones in confusion. What was going on? He saw Logan, Patton, and Remus looking at him and realized he had tears on his face. Shit.

“I’m fine guys,” Virgil assured them, quickly wiping off his tears. 

“No you’re not kiddo,” Patton sighed. “I let the thing with Christmas build up for too long. I’m not gonna make that mistake again. I’m not gonna force you to talk, but Roman just went to get you some art supplies, your sketchbook, and the journal Remus got you, so you’re gonna do something to cope, got it?”

“Okay,” Virgil mumbled. He really didn’t want to talk, but it was probably good that Patton was making him do  _ something _ other than dwell and spiral. So when Roman returned with the coping things, Virgil scooted to the floor and laid out his sketchbook, put back on his headphones, and painted while the others went back to talking. And when he finished the painting, he actually pulled out the journal Remus had gotten him, surprising himself when he realized he actually wanted to write some of these thoughts down. He hadn’t used it since Remus had gotten it for him, because anything that was bothering him was bothering him because he didn’t want to think about it. But now, he just wanted to voice his worries without having to burden the others. He needed to get at least some of them out of his head, so he opened to the first page of the journal, and wrote.

_ Dear Journal, _

_ I don’t know how to do this, but here I go. I’ve been anxious recently, which is no surprise, but it’s been harder to deal with, so I’m just gonna write it down. I don’t really know how to explain it all, so I’m just gonna make a list. _

  * _Home alone_


  * The plan


  * Government


  * Powers


  * Roman getting captured or hurt or discovered


  * Patton and Logan getting discovered


  * Being a burden


  * Being ungrateful



_ There, I did it. I guess we will see if this helps at all. If it does, maybe I’ll do this again sometime soon. _

_ Sincerely, _

_ Virgil _

He closed the journal and looked up to see Remus staring at him. He pulled off his headphones so he could hear the other boy.

“So…” Remus prompted.

“So?” Virgil asked. He knew what Remus was asking, but he wasn’t sure he had the answer yet. Did writing help? Maybe? He felt a little lighter, like he had let go of something, but would it come back?

“Did it help?” Remus finally just asked, looking at Virgil curiously. 

“I dunno, maybe?” Virgil said, settling on the truth. Remus nodded, and Virgil was abruptly reminded of how Remus struggled with intrusive thoughts a lot.

“I get that. I wasn’t sure if it worked for me at first either. But then it did. I just hope it does for you too,” Remus leaned back then smirked. “Cause if it doesn’t I’m gonna have to find another way to set you straight.”

“But I’m not straight,” Virgil replied, and Remus laughed. They kept chatting and Virgil found himself laughing a lot more than he had thought possible before writing. He still felt light as the burden of his thoughts was removed from him and instead placed into the beautiful journal Remus had gotten for him. The others joined and soon they were all laughing and chatting, and Virgil’s worries were able to be forgotten, at least for a little while.

Eventually, Logan and Patton went home. Then Virgil, Roman and Remus went to bed. It had become normal now for Virgil to sleep in Roman’s bed, in fact Roman had suggested they just remove the mattress. But that commitment freaked Virgil out. Because after his parents… sometimes he just couldn’t be touched. And he was glad he had thought of that, cause apparently this was one of those nights.

He didn’t realize it until he had gotten in bed with Roman. But when Roman wrapped his arms around him like he always did, Virgil felt his body tense and his mind brace in anticipation for the pain. Virgil didn’t say anything, but he laid there, tense, as his breathing accelerated and his mind went in loops, telling him it wasn’t safe to be touched, telling him he was going to be hurt, but also reminding him that this was  _ Roman _ , not his parents. He was safe. But he wasn’t.

“What’s wrong V?” Roman finally asked as Virgil’s breathing continued to accelerate, nearing full panic attack. Remus hadn’t gone to bed yet, and he was sitting on the mattress, looking at Virgil curiously.

Virgil didn’t reply. He couldn’t. What if he said something wrong, then his parents would hurt him. He would get hurt because no matter what he said, it would be wrong. He felt his powers boiling to the surface, but he couldn’t let them show, because his parents would definitely hurt him if he did that. Everything in his brain screamed NOT SAFE.

“Virgil?” Roman spoke again, tightening his grip around Virgil slightly, causing Virgil to tense even more. This was Roman not his parents. He knew that. But his brain wouldn’t stop screaming at him to stay still, stay quiet, and DO NOT USE YOUR POWERS.

“Roman let go of him,” Virgil heard Remus say. Yes, please, Roman let go of me please. Virgil began to flicker as Roman didn’t let go yet, and Virgil squeezed his eyes shut on instinct, bracing for impact.

“Why? How would that help?” Roman asked, sounding confused but loosening his grip on Virgil slightly. But his arms were still there. And Virgil was flickering. And he was going to get hurt and locked in the basement and-

“Roman just fucking listen to me, okay?” Remus snapped. “Let go of him or he’s gonna go full invisible.”

After another moment, Roman’s arms disappeared and Virgil was moving before he knew what was happening. He found himself flickering, and cowering in the corner of Roman’s room, by his desk. He saw figures moving closer to him and suddenly the part of his mind that was clinging to Roman disappeared, and he wasn’t there anymore.

He saw his parents moving toward him, hands raised to hit him as he flickered. They were screaming at him, telling him to stop, telling him he was an abomination and that his powers were wrong, trying to make him make his powers go away, but he couldn’t. He went fully invisible and his parents freaked. They continued to scream at him and move toward him, but they couldn’t find him. They told him he was going to spend days in the basement if this continued, but he couldn’t return to visibility he couldn’t-

“You’re in my room,” Roman’s voice didn’t fit here? Why was he here? He would get hurt!

“You are beside my desk,” Roman’s voice continued over the screaming. “There are papers all over the floor. My disney posters are on the walls. There are a lot for Alladin, also one for beauty and the beast, and a lot more. Remus is here too. He is sitting on the mattress set up for you…”

The room he was in slowly began to appear in front of Virgil as Roman continued describing it. He was still invisible and still couldn’t breathe but he was able to see where he was again. His eyes focused on Roman as Roman continued talking, unaware that his invisible boyfriend was back.

Virgil reached out slowly and tapped Roman’s arm before jerking his back in fear, the instincts against touch still running wild. Roman’s eyes filled with relief as he looked in Virgil’s direction.

“Okay my little emo, I’ve got you back here,” Roman said. “Now I need you to breathe okay? Breathe with me, got it?”

Virgil nodded. He knew Roman couldn’t see, but Roman took a deep breath, and Virgil followed best as he could. Then he did it again. And again. And again. Vigil’s breathing was nearing normal as he began to flicker again, before saying visible and Roman sighed in relief.

“Oh they god,” Roman said, reaching out to grab Virgil’s hand before seeing how he tensed and hearing Remus’s objection, so he kept his hand back.

“How are you feeling?” Roman asked instead. Virgil shrugged. “Okay, then what happened?” Virgil just shook his head, and then Remus spoke up.

“Your boyfriend has PTSD, you dumbass!” Remus yelled quietly as to not trigger Virgil again. “He had an attack. I could tell. The second you hugged him he tensed the fuck up and didn’t move. How the hell did you not notice it!?”

Roman’s eyes widened and he looked at Virgil again. “Shit oh my god I’m sorry!”

“‘S okay,” Virgil mumbled. It really was okay, it wasn’t Roman’s fault, but his nerves were still shot and he was tired.

“No it’s not!” Roman ran a hand through his hair. “God it makes so much sense! You don’t like sudden touch, you wanted to keep the mattress in here for this reason, right?”

“Yeah,” Virgil admitted. “Not your fault though. Don’t really wanna talk. Step back, maybe?”

Roman moved back immediately. Virgil glanced at Remus who got off the mattress without a word. Then Virgil moved over there very slowly, very cautiously, and laid down. Roman grabbed a blanket and looked at Virgil for permission before laying it over him. Virgil curled up, and Roman sighed. Remus gave Roman a hug then said goodnight, and he left. Then Roman got in bed and… and Virgil was still scared.

“Roman?” Virgil asked.

“Yeah?” Roman replied quietly.

“I’m scared,” Virgil admitted in a pathetically small voice.

“I know,” Roman said. “What can I do?”

“I…” Virgil started. “I want someone to hold me but I… I think that would make it worse.”

“Want a big pillow to hug?” Roman offered. Virgil wasn’t sure how much it would help, but he nodded and Roman brought him a large, white, body pillow. He set it down a few feet from Virgil and then stepped back and Virgil took it. He hugged it against him and sighed.

“That help?” Roman asked. Virgil nodded. Though he still wasn’t sure he could sleep, it did help. Roman could tell it wasn’t enough though. “Want me to leave all the lights on instead of just the nightlight?”

Virgil nodded again, and Roman got up and turned on the lights. He also grabbed something from Virgil’s bag and held it up. It was the dream catcher Patton had gotten him. He hadn’t put it up cause it wasn’t his room, but he had kept it in his bag as a source of comfort. Roman hung it up where Virgil could see it before he laid back down.

“Anything else you need?” Roman asked.

“No, it’s not as scary anymore,” Virgil said. He sounded small and pathetic and he hated it, but some part of him didn’t care, because it was Roman. Roman smiled and closed his eyes. Virgil watched as Roman’s breathing slowed as he fell asleep, then he turned his attention to the dream catcher. 

Virgil thought there was no way he’d fall asleep that night. Yet somehow, with Roman near, with his pillow, with the light and the dreamcatcher, his fear was able to release its grip on him just enough to let Virgil fall to sleep. The dreamcatcher worked. He didn’t have any dreams that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I hope you guys enjoyed that chapter. Next chapter, it is time to enact this new plan! It will probably be at least a week until I get it out unless my anxiety over waiting for results for a couple things going on this week drives me to write, which is entirely possible. Thank you guys for reading, I really can't wait for you guys to see how this story goes!!!


	12. They text late

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Sorry it's been a little over a week. I had a lot of trouble writing this chapter for some reason, it really did not want to be written. Hopefully you enjoy it!!!   
> Trigger warnings:  
> anxiety, panic attack, unconscious self-harm  
> Hopefully, I didn't miss anything!!!

Winter break came to an end all too soon, and it was time to initiate the plan. They decided to just do it the first day back, as to not cause any more anticipation anxiety in Virgil than necessary, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t absolutely panicking. He tried to convince them to let him come, promising that he was easily anxious enough right now to stay invisible the entire time. But Logan made the point that him being there would make it even more unsafe, and since they are trying to make his powers less associated with his anxiety, using his anxiety to drive them would be counterproductive. So, Virgil stayed. And he waited, waited for a text that meant they were safe. They promised they would text by noon. 

It was 12:05.

Roman was confident in their plan. They had discussed exactly what would be said over the phone call, and all he had to do was create a simple illusion and he would be done. He did struggle some with sounds in illusions, but he had gotten much better at it, plus, everyone around would be allowed to see this illusion, making it easier because it was less centralized. Overall, he was not worried.

They had decided they would do it during lunch, which started at 11:15, and they had promised to text Virgil no later than noon. The plan was simple, Roman would pretend to be getting into his locker while he created the illusion. Technically he was getting into Logan’s locker, as it was the one within sight of the main entrance, where the lead government worker often was, but he knew no one would notice.

He opened Logan’s locker quickly, having memorized his combination when they all started dating. He saw Patton walk by in the hallway. He was going to feel out the area for any suspicion, then give Roman the signal if it was all clear. When Patton bounded over to him with a smile and a “hi kiddo!” he knew he was good to go.

He tuned out what Patton was saying as he mindlessly grabbed one of Logan’s books, all of his focus on the head government man. He had a real phone, so creating the illusion of a fake one would definitely cause suspicion. Instead, he would just create the illusion of a call on that phone. 

Roman heard the phone start ringing and glanced at Patton, who kept talking as if nothing was happening. Right, don’t be suspicious. Keeping his focus on the phone, he reached to grab another random book as the man answered the “phone call”.

“Hello, this is a restricted phone. Please state your business calling or I will end this call.”

Roman absently grabbed Patton's hand for support, suddenly very nervous. If he screwed this up, then Virgil could never live even an ounce of a normal life again. He would be stuck in hiding forever, struggling with the demons within his own mind alone. He had to get this right.

“I have a tip on the boy.” Roman made the illusion of a deep, adult voice, nothing like his own or any high schoolers. Patton was still talking and he was vaguely pretending to be listening, his head tilted toward Patton, but his eyes on the phone, holding up the illusion easily.

“Can I have a name or would you like to remain anonymous?”

“Anonymous. I saw the boy getting on a bus heading north out of the U.S. The bus was set to cross the border to Canada. I believe the boy is trying to escape.” 

When discussing their plan they decided that making them think Virgil was leaving the U.S would get them moving quicker, as they would not want to let him cross the border and get out of their grasp. But they also needed to be as vague on information as they could to send them on this wild goose chase and make it take as long as possible.

“Do you know what bus it was? Or when it will cross the border?”

“I’m sorry to say I do not. I have given you all of the information I have. I hope it will come to be helpful, this boy must be caught.”

Roman winced at the words he created before ending the fake phone call. He watched the government worker put his phone away and turn to his colleagues before really looking at Patton.

“Did you do it?” Patton asked quietly, seeing that the illusion had ended.

“I hope so,” Roman replied. “Now, we have to find Logan then text Virgil before he has a panic attack.”

“Okay, kiddo, lets get outta here,” Patton agreed. Roman closed Logan’s locker but kept the random books he had grabbed so as to not cause suspicion. He would return them later. First, they had to find Logan. Logan was stationed at the back entrance to see what kind of message was spread to the other workers after the call, to see if they were successful. 

Roman and Patton continued to hold hands as they walked, moving much slower than Roman would have liked. He just wanted to get there and make sure Logan was okay, and make sure their plan worked. It had to work.

As they neared the back door, Patton froze, stopping Roman in his tracks, and he dragged the taller boy back around a corner, his eyes wide.

“Patton, what is it?” Roman asked frantically. What had gone wrong?

“They’re suspicious,” Patton whispered. “Like, really suspicious. I don’t know why though, I just want to get Logan out of there as soon as possible.”

Roman nodded then let go of Patton’s hand, walking around the corner confidently, in plain sight of the workers who were discussing quietly amongst themselves. Roman swallowed as he walked by them, seeing Logan at the other end of the hallway, leaning against a locker and pretending to read. Roman approached him at a painfully casual pace.

“Hey Logan!” Roman called happily. Logan looked up at him and raised an eyebrow. Roman just gave a small jerk of his head and Logan immediately put his book down. He followed Roman down the hall, taking the long way back to Patton, who was still in the same corner as before.

“Logan, have you seen anything?” Patton asked quietly as they approached. Logan nodded, a small smile blossoming on his face.

“I have, actually,” He started. “It appears that sometime in the near future the workers will begin to leave to follow the lead Roman ga-”

Logan was cut off by an announcement over the intercom.

“All students please assemble in the auditorium. A final search of the school is to be conducted before these kind workers depart. Please thank them for their work, and wish them luck as they continue to search for this threat.”

Logan, Roman and Patton exchanged a look. Patton reached for his phone to text Virgil quickly, but Logan grabbed his wrist to stop him.

“Text him after,” Logan said. “We cannot get caught texting him. Not with this search. Just… wait until after. He will be okay.”

Patton hesitated, then nodded, letting his phone drop back into his pocket. Roman handed Logan his books, which he put into his bag before the three made their way to the auditorium. They sat in the back and set their bags in their laps as instructed. Government workers were swarming the aisles, going through each student's bag, while they heard more in the hallways, opening and closing lockers quickly. A few kids were sent to the office after drugs were found in their bags or lockers, but whatever they were really looking for, whatever lead on Virgil they thought they’d find in random high schoolers backpacks was not found.

It was nearing 12:30 when the principal finally stepped onto the stage with the lead worker. Roman felt Patton’s hand inching toward his phone which had been buzzing on and off for the past 20 minutes, along with Logan and Roman’s. Roman grabbed Patton’s hand to hold it still. Roman was worried about Virgil too, but they couldn’t risk it. They could calm Virgil down if they needed to, but if he was caught, then that would be it. 

“Good afternoon students,” The principal spoke, a fake smile plastered on her face. “I'm very sorry for the interruption to your regularly scheduled classes, however it was necessary. A new lead has been found outside of our school, and though I cannot share more than that, know that this search has confirmed that we are all safe. The threat is no longer within our vicinity, and these kind government employees are going to begin their departure today. They will leave a few here for a while in order to assure our protection, but by the end of February they should all be gone and school will go back to normal.”

Hushed whispers exploded through the auditorium as students all began to discuss this new information. It took a minute for the principle to get them to quiet down again, and Logan, Roman, and Patton spent the entire time sitting in silent hope, trying to ignore the persistent buzzing of their cell phones.

It was nearly 1:00 when they were finally released from the assembly, many students having asked many questions, a lot of them seeming to just want to stall to get out of class longer. Around 12:45 the three boy’s phones stopped buzzing, which was to some extent worse than the persistent buzzing before. Once they were released the three of them sprinted to the bathroom, all pulling out their phones, desperate to console their anxious, alone, boyfriend.

Virgil was sitting on Roman’s bed, leg bouncing, phone in hand, all previous attempts at coping abandoned the second the clock ticked past 12. Why hadn’t they texted? What was happening? Were they okay?

12:06

Don’t panic Virgil. It was very unlikely that they would get caught. Their plan was solid. Deep breaths, it’s okay. They are okay.

12:08

Shit, why haven’t they texted yet. Should Virgil text them? No, what if someone else saw it, it could blow their cover. But what if their cover was already blown.

12:10

Fuck it. At this point, if they don’t reply then they were caught anyway. Virgil pulled out his phone and shot a text to Patton. And he waited.

12:11

No reply. Not even read. Virgil tried to keep control of his breathing as he sent a text to Roman and Logan as well.

12:15

Virgil had sent at least 5 texts to each of them now, and none of them had even looked at it. They must have been caught. Virgil felt as if the world was closing in on him. He had to get out. He jumped off of Roman’s bed and sprinted out back, pacing the yard, breathing fast.

12:17

He knew it was unreasonable. If they hadn’t replied yet then why would they reply now? But Virgil texted them again anyway, going to their group chat to text them all at once, desperate for any sort of reply. He even tried to call them. Tears began to fall down his face when he heard each of their voicemails. Patton was first.

“Hey kiddo! You’ve reached my voicemail! Feel free to leave me a message and I’ll listen before calling back, and if you don’t leave a voicemail, I’ll still call back as soon as I can! Sorry for missing your call kiddo!”

Tears fell faster and his knees began to shake as he clicked over to call Roman. It rang for a few seconds before also going to voicemail.

“Roman Prince here. Leave a message if you want. I’ll listen if I feel like it and call back if I want to. Bye!”

Virgil’s hands were shaking so badly at this point that he could barely dial Logan, but he managed it. When this one reached voicemail, his knees finally buckled and he fell into the grass, sobbing and gasping.

“You’ve reached Logan Berry. Please leave a message with your business and I will return your call if necessary.” 

Virgil couldn’t breathe. He kept sending text after text and call after call with no answer from anyone. No one had even looked at his messages! He wasn’t sure how long it had been when he finally turned invisible, unable to control himself anymore. He screamed and threw his phone across the yard in desperation. He couldn’t stop shaking and sobbing. People could probably hear him. And he was invisible. And he wasn’t even supposed to be outside. But he couldn’t breathe and there was more air outside, right?

God this was all his fault! If he hadn’t been so stupid as to try and run from his parents none of this would be happening! He could have just let them kill him and his boyfriends would be safe! But now they were who knew where, probably getting interrogated or experimented on in an attempt to protect him! How could he have let that happen!?

He had to try and help. He had to go to the school and find them but he couldn’t move. His body was shaking and his breaths were so short he wasn’t sure he was breathing at all. It was just then that he realized this was the first time he had been outside since November. It was cold in January without a coat, but he didn’t care. 

He vaguely noticed his phone buzzing from across the yard, but was too scared of what he would find to look, so he just blocked off the noise as the tears kept coming, his invisible body wracked with sobs as he thought of the only people he had ever loved getting hurt to protect something as useless as him.

His phone kept buzzing and his curiosity began to get the better of him. He needed to see what was happening to them so he could help. But he couldn’t move. He was frozen in place, fear and despair rendering him immobile. 

He wasn’t sure how long it had been when he heard the door to Roman’s house being thrown open. He shuddered and curled tighter in on himself. They had found him, it was over, they had his boyfriends and were hurting them and it was all Virgil’s fault and-

“Virgil!” Was that… Roman’s voice? Oh God it was Roman! Another choked sob escaped him, this one of relief as he lifted his head. The world spun around him from lack of oxygen and he suddenly felt as if he would pass out, gasping even more desperately for air. He heard footsteps and the back door was thrown open, and all three of his boyfriends were there. 

Patton looked extremely distressed, tears on his face cause… shit, he could feel Virgil’s feelings right now. The panic and relief and blame and, oh God he was hurting Patton. Logan and Roman looked desperate as Logan’s gaze fell on the phone in the grass. He went over and picked it up then felt around for Virgil, who was yards away from there. 

Oh God, Virgil was weak. He was hurting them and scaring them because he couldn’t handle a little scare. Because he couldn’t have looked at his phone when it was buzzing to see that the texts were probably from his boyfriends, confirming they were alright. Yet still, despite being the cause of their pain he was so, so desperate for their comfort. He let out a whimper as he continued to gasp and Logan quickly turned and looked in his direction. Patton and Roman also stepped forward, causing Virgil to flinch at their sudden movement and Logan to hold up his hand to stop them. 

“Virgil, can you tell us where you are?” Logan asked. Virgil just continued to sob and shake his head, failing to get air in his lungs.

“Just continue making sound, okay?” Logan said after a moment, crawling slowly in Virgil’s direction, a hand feeling around in the air in front of him. It took a minute, but eventually Logan’s hand bumped Virgil and Virgil yelped in surprise before a small, desperate cry escaped his lips and he collapsed against his boyfriend, soaking his shirt in tears and shaking violently as his body fought for oxygen. Logan nodded at the others before wrapping his arms around Virgil and carrying him inside, Roman and Patton following after Roman retrieved Virgil’s discarded phone. 

Once they were inside Logan laid Virgil on the couch and held him. Patton kneeled in front of him as he tried to talk Virgil through some breathing and grounding exercised while Roman got a glass of water. Once his gasping had grown quieter, Roman spoke.

“Virgil how long were you outside like that?” Roman asked in a concerned tone. Virgil couldn’t speak, and he was still invisible, so he reached for his phone and typed the answer.

“Since I stopped messaging you guys” He typed. Logan’s arms tightened around Virgil and Patton gave a small gasp, while Roman just nodded.

“Virgil, are you feeling light headed or dizzy?” Logan this time. Virgil gave a very small nod that sent the room spinning, but he knew Logan would be able to feel the movement. “Probably from lack of oxygen and dehydration,” Logan nodded. “Alright, well, your breathing is sounding better, but not quite normal yet, so why don’t we get that back to normal and hopefully make it so you are visible once more, then we can help you with the water.”

So they did that. It took a while but eventually Virgil became visible once more, and apparently he looked like shit cause the others just looked at him sadly. Roman grabbed a tissue and used it to wipe Virgil’s chin and it came back… bloody? That was when Virgil felt the pain in his lip and realized he must have been biting it. Patton's hands took his and he gently massaged them open. He hadn’t noticed clenching them into fists, but there was blood on his fingernails from the crescent shaped cuts in his palms. Patton got a damp towel and set to work cleaning them. Once Roman was done cleaning up Virgil’s face, Logan held up a glass of water to his mouth. Virgil drank it all with Logan’s help while Patton wrapped bandages around his palm. When he was done the rim of the cup was slightly bloody, but no one commented.

He wasn’t as dizzy anymore but still felt very light headed and was completely exhausted from the attack. He glanced at the clock which read 4:00PM. He had been like that for over 3 hours. He sighed and rested his head back on Logan’s chest, his eyes falling closed immediately.

“We should probably bring him up to my bed, we can wake him up in a couple hours for dinner.” Virgil heard Roman suggest.

“Yes, that sounds like a satisfactory plan.” Logan agreed. 

Patton must have nodded or something as well, because after a moment Virgil felt himself being lifted off the couch and carried up the stairs. He felt himself being placed in a bed then… then the person tried to leave. His eyes shot open and he cried out, reaching desperately in the direction of the others who were in the doorway. He couldn’t let them leave again. Something could happen, and he couldn’t let anything happen. Logan and Roman glanced at Patton.

“He needs us kiddos,” Patton said, before he walked back into the room and laid down next to Virgil, wrapping him into his arms. Roman laid down on the other side of him, and Logan sat down on the air mattress. 

Before Virgil could even form a thank you or apology, his exhaustion took over, and he fell asleep.

He was woken up much too soon by Roman gently shaking his shoulder.

“It’s time for dinner love,” Roman whispered. He noticed Patton was no longer on the bed with him, and neither was Roman, all of them sitting on the mattress as if they had just finished discussing something. Virgil yawned and carefully crawled out of bed without a word. His body still felt heavy from exhaustion as he moved. He sat on the mattress the others were on and waited expectantly for an explanation.

So, they explained what had happened. Apparently a search and assembly had gone down and they were unable to text him until it was over. It made sense, and Virgil felt like an idiot for overreaction so extremely. 

“So,” Virgil spoke for the first time since their return. His voice was rough and quiet and he winced at how weak it sounded, along with the way opening his mouth stretched his cut lips painfully. “Did the plan work?”

“It did,” Logan replied. “They should all be gone by the end of February at the latest. Then we will all be safe.”

Safe. The word sounded almost foreign to Virgil. Fake. A word that couldn’t be trusted. But, the person saying it could be trusted. Virgil took a deep breath. He didn’t believe it now, but maybe it would prove to be right. Maybe, just maybe, there was some hope.

“Well, kiddo, why don’t we go eat while you process that. You need some food to help you recover.” Patton spoke up, feeling Virgil’s disbelief and confusion. Virgil nodded gratefully, and the three headed downstairs, the word safe bouncing around in his head, creating hope. He just had to pray it wasn’t false hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you guys for reading!! I hope you enjoyed!! I will continue to try posting at least once a week, but we will see how it goes. This fic has just really been fighting back on being written recently. I am hoping to get back in the groove again soon, but until then I'll just keep pushing it to be written and hopefully it won't be horrible. My collab fic and my other fic though are very happy to be written, so I will keep updating those, the collab on schedule and the part two probably every few days, no promises though.  
> Anyways, I hope you enjoyed!! I will keep writing this fic, I promise! I am determined to see it through to the end, I have a great plot planned, I've just gotta write it!!!


	13. Virgil learns to feel safe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.... I'm baaaack  
> I am so so sorry for the like three week wait!!! I'm not even going to try to say I'll get back to weekly, at this point what happens happens and I'm sorry.  
> This chapter is a bit longer than normal and you waited this long and it's kind of a filler chapter to so...sorry again. It is also unedited so oops. And also I'm not in the best mental state right now like I'm lowkey dissociating so I'm not even sure the chapter makes sense but you know what, I had to get something out so I did my best. Hopefully it isn't a complete disaster.   
> Anyways, so sorry again for the wait and for the kind of messy chapter, my life has blown up in my face and I'm a mess honestly, but I know I'm not the only one so I'm not gonna go out here trying to make this all about me. I will continue to write this fic, I swear, I have just decided to give up on any sort of writing schedule and just post whenever so...sorry in advance.  
> I hope you guys enjoy this complete mess of a chapter enough to forgive me for the wait :/  
> Anyways, here are the trigger warnings and I'll let you get to actually reading the writing disaster that you waited three weeks for lol  
> Trigger warnings: PTSD, scars, anxiety attack, flashback, abuse, phantom pain, knife, depression, self-deprecation and I think that's it but feel free to yell at me if I missed anything

It had been a little over a week since they initiated the plan, and it actually appeared to be working! Government workers were leaving at an increasing rate, half of them were already gone! Virgil was actually starting to trust the hope, the safety that was soon to come. His anxiety over his boyfriends being at school was lessening and he was doing better than he had in a long time, which for Virgil meant he could make it through a day without a panic attack. So not amazing, but better.

They hadn’t really been doing much with Virgil’s powers recently because of how emotionally turbulent he had been. But Virgil knew Patton had been keeping an eye on him, trying to help Logan gauge when he was ready, because he really did have to work on getting control. Even if the government people left, he’d never be safe if he couldn’t get control. And with him doing better recently, and with Virgil’s desperation for that safety, he agreed to try again. 

They all went to the roof like they always did for practicing with their powers. The others had been practicing recently, and Virgil had a bit at the beginning but he had stopped and hadn’t really made much progress. Roman was able to centralize his illusions better, Patton had gotten control of the range of his powers, and Logan could even control the time he looked into within about a week now. They were all getting better, and Virgil couldn’t even leave the house because he just turned invisible at random. He was so fucking weak.

“Okay,” Patton cut into his thoughts, probably sensing the nose dive his emotions were going into. “How about we not get all depressed and anxious before we even start. How’s that sound kiddo?”

Virgil laughed and nodded, his emotional state still not great but his thought spiral paused by the distraction. He felt a hand on his shoulder and with the thought of his powers and their negative effects in the past at the forefront of his mind he quickly flinched away with a small yelp. The hand disappeared. 

“Shit, sorry,” Roman apologized quickly. “Just trying to help, love.”

Virgil nodded but couldn’t find his voice to reply, his heart rate still racing from the touch.

“Perhaps we should ask permission when we touch him right now,” Logan suggested. “Virgil connects his powers with his abuse, so he is likely more sensitive to that right now. While often a gentle or expected touch is fine, even that may trigger him right now, so warnings may be important.”

Yeah, that sounded like a good idea. Virgil nodded again and took a deep breath, calming his nerves. Patton gave him a supportive smile.

“Okay,” Virgil found his voice. “So, goals. Me turning invisible and being able to control it, and me not having a flashback or anxiety attack. That sounds...manageable.”

It didn’t sound manageable at all actually, but he was going to try anyways. The others nodded, seeming to think it was actually manageable, and Virgil tried to draw on that belief in him. 

“Patton will monitor your emotions the entire time so we can help talk you down before anything gets too bad,” Logan reminded him. “Now, do you remember how we did this last time?”

Virgil knew Logan remembered and could easily instruct him, plus Logan always wrote stuff down after training, but he was trying to get Virgil more involved and out of his head, so Virgil would try.

“Yeah,” Virgil replied. “Basically I held your guys’s hands to ground me to prevent a flashback and focused on the feeling of being invisible.”

“Exactly,” Logan said. “So, would you like to try that again?”

Virgil hesitated. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to do this time. He wanted to avoid having a flashback obviously, but he also didn’t really want to touch anyone right now. He didn’t feel horribly over anxious right now, hence why Patton wasn’t stopping them, but he did feel off. It was one of those days where he just wasn’t sure he wanted to be touched. But he also knew how much the grounding helped. 

“I’m not sure,” Virgil admiteded. Maybe by telling them his dilemma they could help. “I know the touch helps to ground me but I also just...don’t really want to be touched right now I guess? I dunno.”

“Like that one night over break?” Roman asked. Virgil nodded. “Okay, then we won’t touch you. We could talk instead or something, but we don’t want to do anything that could make you feel worse.”

“Okay, yeah,” Virgil nodded again. “Okay, you guys talk then and I’ll try it.”

Virgil focused on the feeling of being weightless while Patton and Roman struggled for something to say. After a few moments of them opening and closing their mouths like idiot fish, Logan cut in. 

“Tonight is a full moon,” Logan started, picking astronomy for the topic. “Though in cities we can’t often see the stars very well, we will definitely be able to tell it is a full moon.”

Virgil felt his powers kick in as he began to flicker, still focusing on Logan’s voice. 

“The full moon is often seen as something that heightens emotions and creativity,” Logan continued. “Ceremonies during the full moon are seen as good ways to help people heal.”

Virgil felt himself go invisible, and the moment it happened he knew he was going to fall into a flashback, but he wasn’t scared of it, because when he came back he would have his boyfriends here to help. But Logan didn’t know Virgil was falling away from them, and as he praised Virgil, his voice morphed and Virgil was no longer there.

_ “Good job son,” Virgil’s dad said, standing over Virgil with a knife as Virgil bit his lip and forced himself to stay visible. “Good job, not using your powers today. If you make it to the evening I won’t even have to use this on you.” _

_ Virgil’s dad spun the knife in his hand and Virgil’s breath hitched. He flickered but his dad didn’t notice, and his mom wasn’t home from work yet. Just a few more hours of forcing his anxiety and powers away, and he would be safe.  _

_ “Of course, knowing what a failure you are, you’re not gonna be able to do it,” Virgil’s dad laughed, dragging the flat side of the knife down Virgil’s face tauntingly as Virgil held his breath, fear rendering him frozen. Somehow, miraculously, he managed not to go invisible. Virgil’s dad raised his eyebrows. _

_ “Well, I’m impressed boy,” he said, stepping back. “Now, go make dinner.” _

_ Virgil was so relieved to be free he let his guard on his powers down for just one moment as he began to walk towards the kitchen. Suddenly, the front door opened loudly, and the sound shocked Virgil so much his powers overtook him and he was invisible. _

_ “God damn you!” Virgil’s dad yelled, running over to where Virgil was before Virgil could move and grabbing his hair. “Son of a bitch, you’ve screwed up big time son.” _

_ His dad moved his hands over Virgil’s body to find his shoulders, pulling off his hoodie and turning him around so he could get to Virgil’s back. His mom glanced at them and chuckled as she walked through to the kitchen. Virgil’s dad didn’t even bother trying to get off Virgil’s shirt as he dragged the knife down Virgil’s back, unable to see how deep he was cutting so he just pressed down as hard as he could. Virgil screamed and he heard his mom’s laugh grow louder from the kitchen. _

_ His father continued to carve into his back, random jagged lines, leaving his father's hands covered in blood that became visible as it was separated from Virgil’s body. Eventually survival instincts kicked in and Virgil went apathetic, allowing his anxiety to loosen its grip on his powers and making him visible once more. Once he was visible his father stopped.  _

_ “I only give you what you deserve, boy,” His father growled. “Damn kid using your damn powers whenever you feel like it. This is what you get.” _

_ Virgil sobbed on the floor for hours that night until his mom literally kicked him into his bedroom. The next day he was forced to clean up the bloodstains. They didn’t feed him for three days. It was what he deserved. _

Virgil came back with a gasp, the scars on his back throbbing and burning with phantom pain. He cried out as he moved, the pain forcing itself to be known. He was still invisible, but knowing he was here he wasn’t scared of being invisible, just generally scared from the memory.

He realized his breaths were coming out in gasps as his boyfriends stared at the area he was in. He was still standing somehow. All three of his boyfriends were holding their hands in plain sight. Roman and Logan looked frantic and concerned, while Patton just looked sad. Patton could feel what Virgil felt. He felt that Virgil was back, and he felt his turmoil from the memory even though he trusted and loved the people in front of him.

“Kiddo, you’re back, right?” Patton confirmed, his voice quiet and nonthreatening.

“Mhmm,” Virgil hummed, trying to regain control of his breathing. He needed to sit down, but every movement put him in pain. He didn’t want to admit his pain though. He trusted his boyfriends and they helped him so much, and they could continue doing that without knowing about the phantom pains Virgil suffered from, without knowing about the deep uneven scars littering his back. 

He decided his need to sit down and catch his breath outweighed the pain and let himself collapse onto the ground, a groan of pain escaping his lips when he did so.

“Virgil tha-” Patton started, sounding frantic now as well. Shit, he could probably tell Virgil was in pain. Normally he pushed it from his mind, the pains hadn’t been this bad in a while and Patton probably didn’t notice, but right now...fuck. “Virgil are you in  _ physical _ pain?”

Virgil was too emotionally exhausted to lie. “Mhmm,” he mumbled once more. He forced himself to take a few deep breaths, fighting for enough air to continue. “Phantom pains. Happen sometimes.”

Logan nodded sadly. “Virgil you don’t need to say anything else, just keep breathing until you can become visible again, then we will discuss this.”

Virgil didn’t reply, he just followed Logan’s instructions. He was surprised to find how much control he had over his thoughts at the moment despite his recent flashback. He’d made a lot of progress since running away he realized and allowed himself a small smile. It only took a few minutes before Virgil was visible. Tears appeared in Roman’s eyes when he flickered to life, and Virgil realized he was curled up in a fetal position, tears on his own face. He wiped away his tears and tried to uncurl himself but winced as he shifted his back. Logan stepped forward to help, and while Virgil didn’t flinch he did lean slightly away, not wanting to risk anything sending him back there again. Logan nodded and stepped back again.

“I’m okay,” Virgil assured them and he was surprised to realize that emotionally, it was true, or at least more true than it normally would be in this situation. He wasn’t great obviously, but even after that flashback, he felt safe, and he felt prepared to deal with the after effects of it. He slowly uncurled himself, wincing at the movement but continuing anyways until he was sitting criss cross on the ground. “You guys can sit down too. I’ll try again, but I need a minute.”

Patton was sitting down before Virgil had even finished, knowing exactly where Virgil was at emotionally and predicting his needs. Logan and Roman were quick to join them on the ground so that they were all sitting, Virgil across from his three boyfriends. Virgil gave them a small smile.

“Obviously you don’t have to answer this love,” Roman spoke up, keeping his voice quiet. “But what hurts? And why? And how often does this happen? And why-” Roman cut himself off when Patton glared at him. “Sorry.”

“No, it’s okay,” Virgil assured. “Honestly I don’t really want to tell you guys but...um...I trust you guys. You deserve to know.”

“Star,” Logan cut in. “Honey, you don’t have to-”

“I’m going to though,” Virgil interrupted. He took a deep breath. If he could feel safe after a flashback like that because they were here, he could tell them this. “I generally get phantom pains when I’m anxious. Normally I don’t even notice them until I go to bed and don’t have as much to distract me honestly. They normally aren’t that bad, but a flashback like that flared them up. It’s always some place I have a scar or was injured in the past by my parents, right now it’s my back because I just had a flashback to when-” Virgil paused. Should he tell them this? Well, he’d gone this far, might as well. “When my dad cut up my back with a knife until I tuned visible.”

Patton gasped, Roman had murder in his gaze, and Logan didn’t look surprised, but looked horrified all the same. 

“Oh, come on, y’all saw me after they threw me in the basement for days and beat me;,” Virgil shrugged then hissed in pain as he was brutally reminded of why this conversation was happening. “Sure, bringing a knife into it probably makes it worse, but you guys got me out of there, it’s fine.”

They didn’t seem to agree with it being fine, but they didn’t object.

“Virgil can I sit next to you?” Roman asked suddenly. Virgil nodded and Roman scooted so he was close enough that him and Virgil’s shoulders were just a hair away from touching. Virgil hesitated only a moment before leaning into his boyfriend. Roman wrapped his arm around Virgil automatically and Virgil yelped and jumped back as it made contact with his back. “Damn it, fuck, I’m sorry love, are you okay?”

Virgil nodded again and slowly leaned back into Roman, his trust outweighing the fear ingrained within him. Roman didn’t wrap his arm around Virgil’s back this time, instead settling it on the ground behind Virgil. Virgil could feel him fiddling with the bottom of his shirt and knew he was curious to see, but didn’t want to ask. Before Virgil could even contemplate what to do about that, he found himself speaking.

“You can see if you want,” Virgil said. He wasn’t sure why he said it, but he didn’t necessarily regret the offer either, so he didn’t say anything to contradict himself. 

Roman glanced at Patton for emotional confirmation before carefully helping Virgil out of his hoodie and lifting Virgil’s shirt. Virgil heard a small gasp then pain flashed through him as Roman placed his fingers on one of the scars and he flinched, but didn’t pull away. Roman froze, then slowly pulled his hand away. Logan scooted over to see as well and hummed sadly while Patton hesitated, before ultimately joining them as well. Virgil gave them a few minutes before scooting away slightly to signal that he was done and Roman quickly dropped the shirt.

“Starlight, my love,” Logan spoke, scooting in front ov Virgil so he could meet his eyes. “We are so sorry we didn’t do anything sooner. We knew it was bad but we… we had no idea…”

“It’s okay,” Virgil cut in. “It is really okay, I promise. I don’t blame you guys, okay? So please don’t blame yourselves.”

“We shall try not to,” Logan agreed. Virgil gave him a small smile. 

“Okay, other than the fact that my back is killing me I think I’m good to try again,” Virgil said after a moment. “And it’ll probably be bothering me for the rest of the day if not longer, so let’s just go for it.”

“You sure, kiddo?” Patton asked worriedly.

“I’m sure,” Virgil nodded. The others got up and Virgil went to follow but struggled and fell back down when a flash of pain went through his back. “Fuck!”

“Here, let me help,” Roman came forward and offered him a hand. 

Virgil was about to deny it, still not really wanting much touch, but then decided, fuck it, and took a deep breath as he slowly took Roman’s hand. Roman held back gently at first, but then his grip tightened as he helped pull Virgil to his feet. Virgil focused on his breathing the whole time and quickly let go of Roman’s hand once he was on his feet, and Roman released him as well.

“Okay, here I go again,” Virgil muttered. He focused on the feeling of being weightless and went invisible once more. He felt his mind trying to pull him back there again but resisted, returning to visibility before he could fall into that darkness.

Words from his parents echoed through his head as he returned to being visible and pain flashed through his back once more. He closed his eyes tight shut against the memories that were just as painful in normal memory form as they were as a flashback, if not as intense. He put his hands on either side of his head and took some deep breaths, trying to push the memories away.

The pain in his side from the kicks.

The clenching of his stomach from starvation.

The words they said.

_ Abomination _

_ Disappointment  _

_ Unnatural  _

_ Worthless _

_ Failure _

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck,” Virgil muttered, shaking his head, trying to shut up thw words and the memories. “Fucking dumbass parents stupid PTSD fuck this shit fuck all of it!”

After a few moments of this the voices quieted and the memories ceased their attacks and Virgil was able to open his eyes. He saw the concerned looks of his boyfriends watching him struggle but not knowing what to do.

“No flashback that time,” Virgil said, looking on the bright side. “Just memories and shit. But it’s easier with you guys here. I can do this. I want to try again.”

And so he did try again. And again. And again. The memories continued to come and he continued to have to fight the phantom kicks and unnaturally clear words being thrown at him, but he continued to try, and he managed to find some small amount of control, because he knew no matter what happened or where his brain brought him, he was safe here. After about two hours though, Virgil was exhausted. He was flickering as his energy and ability to fight the memories rising in him weakened and he was fighting tears from the phantom pain still making itself known on his back.

“Virgil, kiddo, you’ve done so well today,” Patton praised. “But I think we need to stop now.”

“I agree,” Logan added. “You have improved your ability to get in and out of your invisible state on your own even if it is still heavily connected to your anxiety. With continued work on this I have no doubt we can limit that connection, however for now you need to rest.”

Virgil nodded, too tired to object. Roman approached him slowly and slowly wrapped an arm around Virgil’s waist to help support him. Virgil tensed at the touch and the pain it caused in his back, but then found himself leaning into Roman, needing the support. Roman helped lead himj downstairs to where Remus was sitting on the couch. When he saw Virgil he quickly got up so Virgil could lay down. Roman helped him get comfortable while Patton got some painkillers and Logan got some food. Virgil wasn’t sure the painkillers would help, but it was worth a try.

Virgil was so grateful of his boyfriends that day. As they sat on the floor to give him some space, showering him with praise and suggesting different distracting activities, Virgil couldn’t even deny the love he felt for them anymore. Love was a scary thing, love meant that they could hurt him, or that he could hurt them. But after today, he found he wasn’t really worried about them hurting him anymore. He trusted them, they were safe, and whether or not school and the world became safe for Virgil any time soon, he would always be safe with them.

Eventually evening came and Roman helped Virgil to bed. He went to helpe get Virgil comfortable on the mattress, but instead Virgil went to Roman’s bed. He was still feeling wary of touch, but this was Roman, and even when Virgil was feeling tired and weak and flooded in memories, he made him feel safe.

Safe wasn’t just false hope, Virgil realized as he snuggled up against Roman, careful of his still sore back. Because whether or not this plan continued to work, Virgil would always have a safe place in the arms of his boyfriends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there you go. Thank's for reading, I'm gonna keep writing this fic just probably more sporadically, sorry again. I hope you got at least some amount of enjoyment from reading that mess of a chapter, and thanks for sticking around with this fic even though I've been such a disaster with keeping up with it. Thanks again for reading, see you guys whenever I decide to update next!!!


	14. Roman Fucks Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooooooo......... I'm back?  
> I'm so, so, so, so sorry for such the long wait omg. And I still have my other fic that I haven't updated in nearly 2 months like this one omg. I'm a mess and just trying to keep above water honestly. I have a whole plan for this fic but I have just not had the inspiration to write it and I'm really sorry. I can't promise I'll do better, cause I probably won't, so if y'all are willing to stick with me through random chapters posted within like the same week then me not updating for over a month, great, and if not that's fair, as a mediocre writer I understand that you may not care enough about this story to deal with that lol.  
> Anyways, we've got another chapter that is mostly just moving the plot forward. Sorry that it isn't great, I suck at writing perspectives other than like Virgil and Remus but it needed to happen (It's Roman's perspective here).  
> Okay, actually gonna let any readers left actually read this chapter now lol, I hope you enjoy it and it isn't too horrible.  
> oh, also, I didn't edit it again cause I'm lazy so...sorry for that too.  
> Trigger warnings:  
> self deprecation, running, panic, fear, creepy warehouse, brief description of a panic attack, mention of PTSD  
> let me know if I missed anything!!!

Roman loved art, he always had. He loved all forms of art, painting, writing, singing, acting, anything that allowed him to channel his creativity and the beautiful and intricate worlds he created in his mind into the real world.

Now, you may be thinking that he already has powers that allow him to do that. But those weren’t something Roman saw as the perfect solution at all. In fact, they were often a hindrance. He loved them and they were perfect for his creative expression, but he couldn’t share them with anyone else the way he could share his art through theatre or drawing. But doing those types of things was a risk too. Diving that deep into his creativity in public allowed him to imagine things more vividly, making them more likely to appear around him unintentionally.

That was why Roman had never taken an art class before this year, his Sophomore year in High School. He had gotten so much better with his abilities that him and the others had agreed it was safe for him to take art class. Obviously that was before the whole Government workers Virgil being revealed thing, but still.

And Roman had been fine. They were over halfway through the year and Roman hadn’t even slipped up once, no matter how deep his creative buzz took him, he always made sure his surroundings never changed. But today, well today was a different story.

Roman had forgotten his earbuds that he normally used while he did his art to keep himself from falling completely into that world. That was his first mistake. The rest weren’t really mistakes though, just circumstances. He was in a bit of a turbulent mood, concern and pride for his boyfriend after the day before mixing up inside him into this weird whirlwind that Roman couldn’t quite make sense of. They were also doing landscapes that day, something extremely easy for Roman to make an illusion of.

So you’ve probably guessed at this point what happened. As Roman painted his picture of a forest in the fall at sunset, beautiful colors from the sun and the leaves reflecting off of each other in a fiery dreamscape, the room began to shift.

Roman didn’t even notice at first. He was so drawn into his art the outside world had disappeared to him. It took the tweeting of a nearby illusionary bird to snap Roman out of it and make him realize, he had really fucked up.

The students in the seats around him were looking around in awe and confusion, and the teacher was reaching for a phone that could no longer be seen. Roman didn’t share this class with anyone that knew of his powers, and he was sure word would spread to the government workers soon. 

Roman let the illusion fall as quickly as possible once he realized what had happened, then before anyone could say anything, he stood up, said something along the lines of needing to use the bathroom, and left.

When he walked out of the classroom he nearly bumped right into Logan, who had a panicked look on his face. Shit.

“Roman, you have to get out, now!” Logan insisted. “Run!”

So, Roman ran, once again channeling his creative energy into some other, non creative activity like he had to do for so much of his life. He knew once they figured out it was him they’d go to his house, so he had to get Virgil out. He ran to the house and threw himself through the front door, panting.

“Roman?” Virgil asked, sounding frantic and confused as he jumped off the couch.

“Fuckin...fucked up...gotta get...out,” Roman panted, leaning against the wall. “Grab shit and...and run!”

Virgil was clearly on the verge of a panic attack as this went down but Roman had noticed that he was pretty good at delaying them if it was an emergency. And as much as Roman wanted Virgil to break that habit, this was an emergency. Virgil ran upstairs followed quickly by Roman. They both grabbed their backpacks and threw in as many clothes and toiletries as would fit, then they left. 

Virgil led, as Roman figured he probably knew the best hideout if you didn’t have a home, considering that had been his situation for a while. That thought still hurt Roman, as he felt like complete and utter shit for not having intervened earlier, but it was too late now, and they had other problems to focus on.

Virgil wove through some very unsafe looking alley’s and past a few constructions sights until, a good hour of nonstop running later (adrenaline was a fucking savior), they ended up in front of an old warehouse that honestly looked like it would fall down at any moment. Parts of the roof were sagging and there were cracks in the walls. The hinges on the doors were broken and you had to lift it off the ground to open it, and even then it squealed loudly, the sound causing some mice inside to skitter quickly away from the light.

“You sure this is safe?” Roman panted, clutching his stomach as he struggled to catch his breath.

Virgil shook his head but continued in anyways. He pulled a random chain by the wall and a light flickered to life, popping and going out a few times before settling on an unsteady, dim glow. The warehouse was filthy and disgusting and probably had so many diseases hidden in its corners, but when Virgil threw his bag against a wall then sat down in a corner without any ceiling shaking, Roman deemed it at least structurally sound.

And now he had time to process what had actually happened. He’d fucked up. Like really bad. They’d had a whole plan and it was working and Virgil was going to be safe and he just had to go out there and screw the whole thing up just so he could do a little art! He was so stupid-

“It wasn’t your fault,” Virgil’s voice came from the dark and dusty corner he was sitting in. “If it wasn’t my fault in the beginning then it isn’t your fault now. Plus I probably wouldn’t even have been able to go back once they left, the teachers would have reported me. Don’t beat yourself up. I love you and I’m not mad and I don’t blame you, okay?”

Roman knew that, he did, and he believed Virgil, especially because other than Roman, Virgil was the one most affected by this so if he wasn’t mad then...he knew the thoughts wouldn’t quit plaguing him but hearing Virgil’s assurance made him feel better. But any more difficult thoughts were quickly stopped when he processed the other thing Virgil said. Virgil had said I love you? Roman had a feeling Virgil hadn’t even realized he said it, considering he wasn’t freaking out about it. Roman decided not to point it out in that case, because the fact that Virgil was curled up in a ball in the corner, facing the wall and shaking suggested that he really didn’t need anything to freak him out even more.

Roman walked over to Virgil and sat down beside him, ignoring the dirt and dust all over the ground, but he didn’t touch Virgil. It was hard, so hard to watch him struggle like this and be unable to wrap his arms around his boyfriend and protect him, but he knew it was for the best. He was learning, and as they helped Virgil recover and work through his anxiety and PTSD, they had to do it at his pace.

Eventually Virgil’s breathing slowed and he opened his eyes, which he had closed as he had been crying. His eyes widened as he seemed to just register where they were and his breathing picked up again. Unsure of what to do, Roman created an illusion, bringing him and Virgil to Roman’s bedroom. That seemed the calm Virgil down a lot, as he was soon leaning on Roman and clinging to him. Roman smiled. He may not be able to use his creativity as much as he wanted because of these powers, but at least they allowed him to help his boyfriend.

A little while later, Logan and Patton showed up (Roman had texted them where they were once Virgil was able to talk again and tell him). Patton and Roman traded off Virgil shifts, and Roman went to talk to Logan about what the fuck they were gonna do now.

“While this is a setback,” Logan admitted. “We did not have a fully thought out plan to reintegrate Virgil into society once they were gone. We should take this as an opportunity to create a fully thought out plan now for both you and Virgil.”

“Yeah,” Roman sighed. “I’m sorry, I really fucked up.”

“It is quite alright, love,” Logan assured. “We just have to make a new plan. We will make this okay, we have to.”

Roman hoped that was true. But at least he could help make the plan part true, as the last hour or so sitting with Virgil, an idea had been formulating in his mind. But first, at the pet name, Roman was suddenly reminded of something else that had happened today that he needed to tell someone else.

“And I will help wherever I can,” Roman promised. “I actually kind of have an idea. But one thing first before we get the whole group together. Um, I think Virgil said he loved me? When I was freaking out when we first got back and he was calming me down. But I don’t think he realized it.”

“That’s wonderful!” Logan smiled. “However with all the stress of the current situation, perhaps you shouldn’t bring it up unless he does, especially if he didn’t realize he said it.”

“That was the plan,” Roman smiled too. “I just really wanted to tell someone.”

“I’m glad,” and for the record, I also love you very much,” Logan replied, giving Roman a quick peck on the lips before turning to Virgil and Patton. Despite Patton and Logan both having already said it to him and him having said it back, hearing the words always made Roman smile. “Alright, Roman says he has an idea for what to do now, are you okay to discuss now, Virgil?”

Patton looked hesitant, clearly there was something more going on than just the stress of the situation. Roman suspected it was the location, considering Virgil had led it to them so easily, but he decided not to point it out as Virgil nodded and put on what was clearly a forced smile. If Virgil wanted to push through, then Roman would let him for now, but at some point he was talking to his boyfriend and being the amazing, supportive boyfriend Virgil deserved. Logan seemed to have the same thought process, as he nodded.

“Alright, then let's get started.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for sticking around and reading lol. Maybe I'll update again soon, maybe I won't, but thanks for continuing to read anyways and hopefully you enjoyed!!!


	15. Yet another plan, and Remus is a cool dude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, look at me, I actually wrote another chapter in a reasonable amount of time!!! Anyways, I hope you enjoy, it's 1.8k again, so not super long, but it's something.  
> Trigger warnings:  
> phantom pains, anxiety, thoughts of abuse, blood, fear of being locked up and tested on, dissociating (Virgil may not realize he's doing it but he totally is)  
> I think that's it, but as always let me know if I missed anything!!!

Virgil hated this warehouse. It just brought back memories of pain. Memories of injuries so bad that he would come hide here instead of going to school because otherwise people would see and suspect. Memories of blood and failed attempts at self first aid. The time he had to give himself stitches based on a YouTube video, or the time he came here and just passed out, and woke up to a mouse nibbling his broken skin. He hated it here, he purposely didn’t come here when he was homeless unless he had no other choice that night. But his parents had never found him here, which meant it was the best place for them to hideout.

They asked if Virgil was okay to plan now, and he nodded, phantom pains objecting suddenly to the movement. But they needed a plan, and Virgil needed not to think about where they were, so he’d make himself okay, at least for now.

“Alright, then let’s get started,” Logan said and they all scooted into a little circle on the floor. “Roman says he has an idea, so, what’s your plan, Roman?”

“Well, since people already know we exist and who we are,” Roman started hesitantly, glancing nervously at Virgil as if he thought his idea was going to upset him. Honestly, he was probably right, all their plans had a habit of upsetting him, so he might as well just spit it out already. “Well, it seems unlikely we are the only ones like us in the world, and it also seems unlikely that everyone thinks we should be experimented on and shit. So I thought maybe we could...make videos? Explaining our situation and how we are actually people. Maybe then if enough people agree, that could at least delay the government.”

He was right. Virgil hated this plan. But as always, he seemed to be the only one as Logan was nodding slowly and Patton was smiling.

“That could work,” Logan said. “We could use your powers to ensure people don’t know where we are. It would have to be only you and Virgil though, as Patton and I must remain undetected so we at least have some people still attending school.”

Roman grinned and nodded, clearly very happy his plan seemed to be agreed upon. Meanwhile, Virgil opted not to say anything. He didn’t want any of them still going to school right now with the workers probably swarming again, but he knew that was unreasonable. And he didn’t want them showing their face and admitting their powers, which considering they were being searched for everywhere because of them was also somewhat unreasonable. And he knew that, but it still scared the shit out of him and he still hated it. It all felt like unnecessary risk, but he knew it wasn’t unnecessary. They couldn't spend the rest of their lives hiding out in this place. The risks were necessary, and barely even risks. The chances of Patton and Logan’s powers being discovered were extremely low as there was no way to tell they even had them. And with Roman and Virgil already being known to the government, having civilians know why they were being searched for instead of just knowing they were wanted probably wouldn’t do much harm.

Virgil still hated the plan. But he didn’t say anything, because he knew logically it was a good plan, and if he shared any of his worries the others would counter them the same way he just had in his own head, and he’d still worry. So, best not to say anything at all.

Of course his worries could never get past Patton though.

“Can I touch you, kiddo?” Patton asked suddenly, breaking into Virgil’s thoughts. Virgil broke out of his head suddenly and noticed all three of his boyfriends looking at him. Fuck.

“Uh, no, I’m okay,” Virgil said. He was having enough phantom pain from the location he didn’t want to be touched, even though he knew it would be comforting. And he didn’t want them to worry about him anymore than they already did.

“You don’t have to be in the videos if you don’t want to be,” Roman pointed out. Virgil realized he was right. If they only shared Roman’s story for now, then Virgil wouldn’t have to have anything to do with it. He’d still worry about Roman though.

But with Virgil’s parents being such a big part of why this was happening, Virgil was scared. He didn’t want them to know anything about him, because his anxiety was just so sure that they would find him somehow. And he couldn’t do that anymore. They fucked him up way more than he’d ever admit to anyone, and the idea of seeing them again filled him with more fear than he could articulate even in his thoughts. 

“Okay,” Virgil nodded. He wouldn’t be in the videos, and he could handle the anxiety about his boyfriends. He’d done it this long, he could do it for a bit longer. He got them into this situation anyways, he deserved any anxiety and fear it caused him.

“Great!” Roman smiled. “Either Patton or Logan, or both, can go back to my house and get a camera and also some stuff for us, and tell Rem what’s going on. Then I can work on making the video!”

“I’ll go!” Patton offered. “Logan can help plan out more details, since that’s kinda his thing.”

“That sounds good,” Logan nodded before voicing Virgil’s anxieties without him even having to say anything. “Just be careful, we don’t want anyone to see you coming in and out of here and getting suspicious.”

“I will, kiddo,” Patton said, standing up. “I’ll be back!”

Then Patton left. Logan and Roman went back to talking, getting into a deep discussion about the content of the video, making sure to include stories without powers involved to show that they are human, but still discuss how the powers affect Roman’s day to day life. Virgil didn’t join the conversation, instead just scooting back into a corner and curling up into a ball, as small as he possibly could.

It was a good idea, and the longer he thought about it the more he realized how unreasonable his anxieties over it were, even if they wouldn’t stop bothering him and they still scared him. But on top of that, he just hated being back in this warehouse. A large scar on his stomach throbbed at the memory of the stitches he had to do in this warehouse to get that injury to stop bleeding. He remembered spending school days here, bleeding and sobbing, because if he went to school like that people would figure it out, then his parents would tell the government about him or kick him out.

Of course, they ended up telling the government anyways, and he left by himself. So maybe he should have just gone to school. Too late now though.

Virgil just wanted to go back to Roman’s house. But that wasn’t an option anymore. Because they were on the run from the government who wanted to cut them up and do testing on them and lock them up and who knows what else.

His parents were looking really good in comparison.

Eventually, Patton got back, and Remus was with him. Virgil knew his boyfriends were just waiting for him to tell them what he needed, but he really didn’t want to talk about this warehouse, and he didn’t want to dwell on his anxieties over the plan. But while they worked on setting up the filming area, Patton glancing worriedly at Virgil every couple minutes, Remus came over and sat next to him.

“So, this situation just escalated from ‘Shit, that’s not ideal’ to ‘FUCK FUCK FUCK!’” Remus said.

“Mhmm,” Virgil agreed.

“Seems like Roman came up with a good idea though,” Remus pointed out.

“Yeah, it’s pretty smart,” Virgil admitted. “As long as people don’t somehow find out where we are or figure out about Lo or Pat, it should be pretty safe too.”

“And with Roman’s powers there’s no way they’ll find you,” Remus confirmed. “But I’m sure you’ve realized that. So then what has you in a fucking anxiety ball in this dirty ass corner?”

Ah. So while the others were waiting for him to say something Virgil wasn’t going to say, Remus was just trying to get him to talk. While Remus’s methods may be a bit harsh sometimes, he always had good intentions. Virgil liked him.

“I don’t like this warehouse,” Virgil admitted.

“Well yeah, I doubt anyone likes this gods forsaken warehouse,” Remus scoffed. “It looks like it’s about to fucking collapse at any moment. How the fuck did you even know it was here?”

Virgil wasn’t lying when he said he didn’t want to talk. But somehow, Remus’s bluntness had him answering honestly before he could stop himself.

“I used to come here when I needed to get away from my parents to take care of some injuries,” Virgil said. “Or if I was too hurt to go to school, I’d hang out here during the day and they wouldn’t be able to find me.”

“Well fuck, so that’s what the blood I saw on the floor was,” Remus muttered. “Well yeah, ‘course you hate being here. But get off your ass and quit dwelling on it. Go talk to your amazing boyfriends and snuggle dude. You know it’ll help.”

He was right. Of course he was. Remus was smarter than people gave him credit for. Virgil looked at Remus and gave him a small smile, and Remus gave him two thumbs up.

“Okay, thanks,” Virgil said as he hissed in pain as he struggled to his feet.

“No problem, dude,” Remus replied.

So Virgil and Remus went over to join the others. And Remus helped Virgil to tell them what was going on, because damn it he said it once and it was really hard to say it again. And so while Logan and Roman finished setting up the camera to film tomorrow, Patton brought Virgil and Remus to the pillows and blankets and they made a pillow fort.

Once Roman and Logan were done they pulled out a laptop and all watched movies in the fort until it was time for Patton, Logan, and Remus to go. Roman and Virgil got comfortable to spend the night in the warehouse, and Roman wrapped his arms around Virgil gently, making Virgil feel safe.

Virgil was almost asleep when Roman said something, in a whisper, as if he thought Virgil was already asleep.

“I love you too,” Roman whispered.

Wait, ‘too’!? When had Virgil said he loved Roman!? He went through the events of the day in his sleepy brain, trying to figure it out and then...oh, he had said it. He’d told Roman he loved him. It was true, but still, Virgil hadn’t meant to say it! 

‘Fuck’, Virgil thought to himself, his last thought before the darkness of sleep overtook him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for reading, I hope you enjoyed this chapter and a little more Remus content. Next chapter (whenever I write it) will be the video and it'll be a bit different, and some more characters will be shown, so you can look forward to that happening at some point in the future, though I make no guarantees that it'll be anytime soon.  
> Feel free to comment, I always love reading them!!!!  
> See you guys next chapter!!!!!


	16. The video

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, I was hit with sudden inspiration, and while this chapter is kinda short, I'm really freaking proud of it, and I hope you guys enjoy it too!!!  
> Trigger Warnings:  
> Anxiety, mention of government being bad, talk of not being seen as people  
> I think that's it actually. Let me know if you think I missed anything!

It took about a week for Logan to figure out the safest way to upload the video, but finally, he’d figured it out. Roman already had it filmed and ready, so all they had to do was post it. The video had been enough of a distraction that Virgil was able to put the whole ‘I love you’ thing to the side, because fuck, Roman was about to reveal his powers to the world.

Virgil, Remus, Patton and Roman all gathered around the computer to watch as Logan got the completed video onto YouTube and hit upload. Then Patton, Logan and Remus went to school.

And all they had to do was wait.

Virgil hated waiting.

Thomas’s social media was blowing up for some reason, and after scrolling in an attempt to find the cause, he figured it out. Someone named Roman had posted a video revealing his powers to the public, and discussing why the government was hunting him down. Which was the reason Thomas had never told anyone other than Joan about his ability to speak to animals. He quickly found the video and hit play.

_ Hello, my name is Roman Prince. And I have powers. _

Remy couldn't believe this. As he sat with his husband Emile watching the video, he just couldn’t comprehend what he was seeing. He’d spent his whole life thinking he was the only one, trying to suppress his powers out of fear of hurting others. Emile was the only one that knew about them, but that hadn’t even been intentional.

Remy felt Emile place a hand on his shoulder and he reached to grab it instinctively. He needed his husband’s support now more than ever.

_ I was born with the ability to create illusions, and kept it a secret for most of my life. But now, due to unfortunate circumstances, the government has discovered my powers, and is now hunting me and my boyfriend who also has powers. _

Yeah, Janus already knew all this information. He worked for the government, obviously he fucking knew this shit. But he felt like crap about it. He’d been using his shapeshifting abilities to hide in plain sight within the government for years. They never discovered him, and he got to know anything he wanted, it was great! But then they had discovered Virgil, then Roman.

Now more than ever he appreciated his decision to hide in plain sight. It kept him safe, and that was all that mattered. Janus’s responsibility was to himself, and only to himself. Yet, watching this video, he couldn’t help feeling bad for these kids. Perhaps if there was something he could do…

_ We are being treated as if we aren’t human, but we are. _

Those words hit home for Emile. When he had accidentally discovered Remy’s powers, he had been terrified. He’d called his own husband a monster. He had, for just a moment, forgotten the man that lived there and instead only seen his powers. It was the worst moment of his life. The moment he regretted the most.

He had come back the next day and apologized, and Remy had cried and he had cried and they had talked and now Emile understood. That was all this Roman boy was trying to get people to do, was understand. He just hoped for his sake that it worked.

_ We don’t deserve to be treated this way just because of one thing that makes us different. We are just like the rest of you. We go to school and do homework, we do chores, we enjoy doing things like singing, or being on stage. _

Thomas remembered the first time he had discovered his abilities. He had been humming a tune while on a walk, and it slowly morphed into more sounds. Not words, just sounds. And suddenly birds began to fly up to him, and one of them had complimented his song. He had been so confused. It took him a few more weeks to figure it out for sure. 

He loved to sing, he loved being on stage, he was a person, just like this other boy and his boyfriend. And they needed help, and nothing was going to stop Thomas from giving it to them. He stopped the video and hunted down the boy’s instagram. He went to his DMs and typed: “I’m like you, I want to help. What can I do?”

He hesitated before hitting send. Even though it was DMs, he was admitting his powers on the internet, where the government could potentially find it. His anxiety was screaming at him to stop, but the rest of him knew it was the right thing to do.

He hit send.

Then he called Joan.

_ But now we are in hiding. Now everything we love to do in life has been taken away because of one part of who we are. We are people, and we deserve to be treated as such. If you agree, please leave a comment showing your support. Let’s show the government how wrong they are. _

Janus didn’t actually care about these kids. That’d be weird. He just wanted to help end this before it got to big, yeah, that was it.

Or at least that was what Janus told himself as he pulled up a secure messaging platform and told these kids that he was a shapeshifter working for the government, and that the government didn’t know of his powers, and he wanted to help.

Just to get this over with, of course.

When the video ended Emile watched his husband blink at the screen in shock. Clearly he wasn’t going to be able to voice what they needed to do, but Emile could do it for him.

“We need to help them,” Emile said. Remy nodded slowly. “Okay, I don’t know much about social media so you’re gonna have to send the message, can you do that?” Remy nodded again and picked up the phone. He typed a quick message, but before he hit send he looked at Emile.

“If the government finds this message, we’d be on the run too,” Remy said. “Are you sure you want to risk that?”

“For you, absolutely,” Emile nodded. 

Remy hit send.

Less than an hour after the video was posted, Virgil was laying on Roman, curled up in an illusion his boyfriend had created so he didn’t have to be in the warehouse and the horrible memories for a bit. Roman’s phone had been blowing up, but neither of them had looked, both too scared of what the comments may say. But finally, Virgil couldn’t take it anymore. He sat up and grabbed Roman’s phone. He glanced at Roman for permission, and after a hesitant nod Virgil turned it on and looked at the notifications and….holy fuck.

“Roman,” Virgil whispered, his voice shaky.

“What, what is it!?” Roman asked frantically.

“We’re not alone,” Virgil replied in shock. “Roman, we’re not alone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, you guys got some plooooooot!!! I hope you enjoyed, feel free to leave a comment, and I'll see you guys again whenever inspiration strikes me next!!!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think! I am not sure how frequently I will post. I have the first three chapters written, but I am also working on other fics right now so I may not post super consistently. Sorry in advance!


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